


Titan Academy

by Darkness_is_my_friend



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Armin Arlert & Krista Lenz | Historia Reiss Are Related, F/M, I'm Bad At Tagging, Inspired by April_Avery's Titan Academy of Special Abilities, Levi Has a Twin (Shingeki no Kyojin), M/M, Mentions of characters from other anime series, Powers and Abilities, Tall Levi (Shingeki no Kyojin), vengeance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-19
Updated: 2021-02-11
Packaged: 2021-03-10 08:03:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 21
Words: 33,318
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27629984
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Darkness_is_my_friend/pseuds/Darkness_is_my_friend
Summary: Evan Kruger was just a normal guy in the town of Sina, not until his best friend, Armin, got involved in great trouble.
Relationships: Levi/Eren Yeager, Mikasa Ackerman/Jean Kirstein, Moblit Berner/Hange Zoë
Comments: 4
Kudos: 22





	1. The Jewelry

**Author's Note:**

> Yoohoo~ I hope you will enjoy this fic, this is my first one. I also hope this will not bore you to death. Characters in this fic are not mine. So.. Yeah.. That's all! Go on and Read! :)

What will you do if you have a power? Do you believe in it? Well, I do. Armin has, his ability is Speed, he can do anything fast. I envy him, I don’t know what’s mine but Armin’s grandfather said that it was powerful, he can feel it. I got thrilled with my damn ability and thought I might hurt them. Oh well, I should be thankful, right?

“Let’s have a race to that hill, Evan” Armin said, already sprinting towards the hill we usually kill time on. He’s always like this, showing off his ability to run fast. I can’t help but chuckled, “You already know I can’t beat you, Armin”

Once we’re on the top of the hill, the Titan academy makes a good view here. Armin’s Dream Academy. He always look at the academy with sparkling eyes, but we don’t have Enough money to get enrolled in that academy. They don’t do free education. We lay down on the grass, Feeling the peacefulness around us. Not until…

“Hey, Evan. Daz found a new—” before he can even finish what he’s about to say, I cut him. “how many times do I have to tell you, Armin. Stop hanging out with that asshole. He only bring trouble to you, remember when he accused you for stealing even if he is the one who stole it?” the thought of him made my blood boil. Armin is just too kind that he forgive the bastard a thousand times.

“We really need the money this time. We don’t have food left… then my job at the library doesn’t pay me” he sighed. I look towards him, and there I saw tears in his eyes. Ever since his parents died, his grandfather is the one who continues to take care and raising Armin and me, along with his sister, Historia. The world is cruel, his grandfather got older. They had no money, Armin depended on that shitty library that he thought he would be paid and mine is also shitty. I can’t help but feel sad. Armin’s parents took me and raised me. They said that they found me in a crate. I never got a chance to thank them.

“Tell me, what kind of job?” I said, giving in. This is the last one. If he can cause trouble and accuse Armin again, I’ll never hesitate to kill that idiot.

Armin look towards me, “I don’t know… but the pay is good. Don’t worry, it’s only for tonight” he said while wiping his tears. “Are you sure about that, Armin? What if it’s dangerous?”

“Evan, please. We really need it. If i finally got the money, I could buy you some cinnamon buns, how’s that?” he said, wiggling his thick eyebrows. He always use cinnamon buns as an excuse, he knows it’s my favorite and just a thought of it made my stomach grumble.

“Okay! Sounds good!” I said, with a smile. Without a word he hugged me. After a while, he pulls away and took a glance at his old wristwatch, “I got to go, Evan. I’ll be back in no time and bring your cinnamon buns” he said, standing up. He held a hand for me and I got it. The sun is already setting and it’s getting dark.

Before I can even turn to him, he’s already sprinting down the hill. I hope he’ll be fine. I took one last glance towards the Titan Academy. I hate it. Students in that academy are mean and cruel. They visit the town once a week and the students will glance at the people in town with pity and disgust. Like they have witnessed the most disgusting things ever in their life. There’s a time that a student hurt an old man who’s just cleaning the plaza. Tsk. Minutes of staring on the Academy, I strode down. I still need to make dinner for Historia and Armin’s grandfather.

(x)

When I was walking the street, I saw Historia playing with her friends in the town plaza. Kids really do have unlimited energy. “Historia! Let’s go, it’s getting dark” I shouted, getting her attention. She’s running towards me while saying goodbye to her friends. When she’s near, I crouched, ready to carry her.

When she saw me crouched, “I’m not a kid anymore to be carried” she said while pouting. Ah, this kid, still denying she likes to be carried. “Come on, Historia. I know you like it” I said and then I carried her. She squealed. And then she starts talking about her day with her friends and she had fun. I’m glad.

Once we’ve arrived at the house, it’s just a simple stone house, I put her down so that she can change her dirty clothes in to clean ones.

While Historia is changing, I prepared for dinner. Armin is right, We don’t have food left. I hope he’s okay and gets the money. While I was slicing the last vegetables, I heard the door open and close. “Oh? Armin? Are you done with your job?” and I turned around.

It’s not Armin. “Oh! Evan, how’s your day? Where’s Armin?” Armin’s grandfather said. He’s really getting weak each day. Wrinkles are already visible in his face. I should lie about armin, I don’t want him to worry. I quickly guide him to the couch, “You should not work anymore, Grandpa” I scolded, “My day is good and Armin is still in the library”  
“I should be the one who’s working, you know? You two should be at school” he said, resting his back against the couch. This is our everyday argument.

“I promise to gather more money so that I can enroll armin and you to Titan academy” he said, smiling warmly that also had my heart warm.

“Forget about that academy, Grandpa. What’s important right now is your health. You should be resting” and then I left to continue preparing dinner. When I looked towards him, he just shrugged with a smile. Despite his old age, he still moves like he’s a teenager and gives the warmest smile.

Minutes had passed, I’m already finished. I guided Armin’s grandfather even if it’s not really necessary. I’m just worried. And Historia jumps on her usual spot in the table. I served the dinner in the table, it’s just a simple salad. Historia grimace at the food, “Vegetables? Again?” she said.

“Yes, Historia. You should vegetables so that you can be strong and healthy” Grandpa said. She really hate vegetables but she don’t have a choice but to eat it anyway. I sat on my usual spot and started picking out in the bowl of salad. “I missed eating meat and cake..” she said, vegetables still on her mouth, and pouted.

Grandpa look up to Historia, “Oh, dear. I promise someday I will buy you tons of meats and cakes, how’s that sound?” he said. I chuckled when her eyes sparkles. “If you finish your dinner, Historia. We’ll buy tons of them” I inserted. With that, she suddenly eat like a monster. Eager aye? We just laughed at Historia’s sudden food frenzy.

(x)

We’re done eating, but Armin’s not here yet. I started to get anxious. What if he’s in trouble again? Damn it, Daz. I’ll kill that asshole if they’re in trouble again.

When I’m done washing the dishes, I walked in the small living room. There, I saw Grandpa already sleepy but he still keep on reading the book he held, Historia is already sleeping in her bedroom. I sighed, “Time for bed, grandpa. You’re already halfway to falling asleep” I said. It made him jump but smiles anyway. I smiled back and guide him to his bedroom, taking slow steps.

When we’re by his door, “But, what about Armin?” he said, worried plastered on his face. I’ll lie again then, guilt is on me, “Don’t worry. He’ll be alright, I’ll wait for him” I said, plastering an assuring smile. With that, we said our good nights. Where are you, Armin?

While I stand in front of the bathroom mirror, I stare at myself. My hair got longer that it’s on my shoulder. I want to cut it because it gets on my face when I’m working. So I grabbed the Scissor and started cutting my hair. Minutes had passed, I’m finally satisfied with my hair. It’s still long but its length is by the chin.

After that, I walk back to the living room to wait for Armin. I turned off the lights, leaving the stand lamp on. To kill time, I read a book. I need to distract myself from worrying about armin, and it’s getting late.

Ten minutes of reading, I felt something wrong from the pit of my stomach. I have also this feeling that I can feel trouble or something is wrong coming.

Before I can stand, Armin came busting at the door. He looks terrible, like he’s running away from something. “Evan! Please help me” he quickly kneel before me with pleading and hurt eyes. It made my heart clench.

“Wait. What happened?” I asked, guiding his shaking body to the couch. “I should have listened to you, Evan” he said, yanking his hair and started crying. So he explained to me that their job, Daz found, was to steal something from the academy and they succeeded. Armin tries to refuse but Daz threatened him. Armin got the thing they stole and turned out to be a Black Jewelry necklace.

“I’m going to kill, Daz” I growled. Before I can stand, in the distance, I heard horses. There many of them. I started to panic, Armin can’t hear the horses. “Armin, listen. Get out of this town with Grandpa and Historia” I said, pushing him to his room. He looked confused, “Why? What about you? We can’t leave without you” he said. We don’t have time, it’s getting near. “Please, Armin. I’ll take care of this. Use the back door to sneak out. Take care, okay?” I cracked. My tears gave in.

I can’t leave them but they must leave. They’re important to me. We hugged each other for a moment and then I helped them sneak out in the back door. Grandpa and Historia is confused but I let them go.

When they’re finally gone, I was alone in the middle of the living room. I wear Armin’s cloak, the one he used when they stole the jewel, and pull up the hood.

When I can finally feel them outside the house, I prepared and pretended to be caught. I heard footsteps, this is it.

A tall figure busted through the door and four figures behind. The tall male one looks very furious, he’s gray eyes were on fire. When the eyes are on me, I flinched. “Où est le joyau, le vol?” he asked with a deep, dangerous voice. I didn’t answer, how am I supposed to answer him when I can’t even understand what he said.

The person beside him spoke, “he said, where’s the jewel” with an annoyed tone. I held out the jewel, He quickly got it from my hand and I quickly adjusted the hood of the cloak.

“Attraper lui” with that, two figures grab both of my arms. Their grasp are so tight, “You’re hurting me”. The tall one beside me, ignored me. But the short one the other arm, lessen it’s grip.

When we’re finally outside, I can finally see them a bit clearly because of the moon’s light, They’re all wearing black coats. The tall one hop on his black horse, “Let’s go. You’re walking, theft” he said. Annoyance crept in me, but I don’t have a choice. The short hair girl got in front of me, two each side of me, and two behind me. Even if I planned to get away, it’s impossible.

We just walk in silence. Cold night breeze hit me, that made me shiver. So I hug the cloak close to my body. I hope they’re okay...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Translation:  
> "Où est le joyau, le vol?" = Where is the jewel theft?  
> "Attraper lui" = Grab him


	2. Titan Academy

We stopped at a huge steel gate of the academy. Minutes later, the gates opened but there’s another gate not far. Then the five people hop off from their horses and the horses are being fetch by the guards.

And then the second gate is being opened. I expect it to be gloomy and empty but I was wrong. The landscapes are beautiful and there’s also Lavender flowers everywhere. Clean cobblestone path. A black elegant fountain in the middle. And finally, a castle like academy, giving dark but beautiful aura.

I never thought that behind those huge gate looks like this. I bet inside the academy looks good too. After a walk through, we’re now in front of big double doors, dragon wings carved on the door.

The short hair girl opened it by pushing through, I squinted when the lights inside hit my eyes. I adjusted and there I saw a gigantic black chandelier up on the ceiling. There’s a spiral stairs that will bring you to… 4 floors.

Everything is beautiful. As we walk through the dark wooden floor, I felt out of place. I’m still dirty and my boots are… Worst.

I heard someone tsk behind me so I look back. There, I saw the two-toned hair guy, emotionless. When I turned my gaze to the tall one, I can finally see his face. He has a sleek black hair, slim nose, sharp eyes, thin eyebrows and lips. He also has a pale skin. He felt familiar… I keep staring at him not until he raise an eyebrow. I quickly looked away and then I felt warm. Damn it.

I expect them to bring me to a cold dungeon but instead they brought me to a room with a big round table in the middle. There are Four people in the room. A beautiful pale woman sitting along with a man wearing a cowboy hat whose feet are crossed on the table, a brunette with glasses, and a blond man beside her. When they felt our presence, all their eyes are on me, I felt conscious.

“Finally! Please have your seats” the brunette said, also taking her and followed by the blond. The people who surrounded are already walking to their seats.

What am I supposed to do? Do I sit too? Or I’ll just stand? When they are all settled in, they all look at me with confused look. “Are you just going to stand there?” the bald one said. Oh shoot.

With that, I quickly took my seat far away from them. A moment of silence. “Where’s the jewel that you stole, Arlert?” the pale woman asked. I froze, they knew armin? I didn’t answer. The jewelry is not with me.

Then the tall one held out the black jewelry. The pale woman look at it and then her gaze turned towards me. “Where’s Arlert?” She said, squinting her sharp eyes. Oh no. What am I supposed to do? She already know I’m not armin, I still didn’t answer.

“Show yourself. Get the hood off” she said. She looks powerful in her state right now, I should not disobey. I will be killed right here and right now if I don’t obey her orders.

I slowly took off the hood. Her eyes turned From hard to soft. The people who brought me here look at me with surprise look.

“What’s your name?” the pale woman said. I couldn’t lie anymore. “My name is… Evan. Evan Kruger” I said. She stared at me for a moment, “Why are you here, Evan? We need Armin Arlert here, not you”

“Please, punish me instead. I’m the one who made him stole it” I said, standing up. Lie. “I know you’re not.” she said with a dangerous voice, squinting her eyes again.

Oh no, I pressed the wrong button, She hates lying. She knows I’m lying. “We already had the person who was with him. Daz” she continued and that left me speechless.

“Are you sure you’re taking Arlert’s punishment?” she asked. This is better, than Armin is the one who will be punish. “Yes, I’m sure” She looked amused with my answer.

She look at the people at the table and then at me. “How about this, instead of kicking you in to the dungeon, how about you’ll be a replacement for our Squad seeker?” she said and raised an eyebrow.

“What do you mean?” I stuttered. What’s squad seeker? I never heard of it.

The tall one suddenly got up from his chair, “You can’t just let that theft in the squad!” he said furiously and pointing a finger at me. “I bet his ability is not suit for a seeker” the two-toned hair guy added, Mocking me. That annoyed me but.. “Silence!” the pale woman angrily said. I can feel danger here.

The two pale people threw glares at each other, like they’re communicating through their minds, but the tall one gave in.

People in the room, including me, sighed in relief, we thought it’s the end of the world. The woman calm herself down, “How’s that, Evan? I can feel power in you” she said smiling sweetly.

I can’t just push the opportunity away. I’ll show them who’s weak then. I’ll do this for Armin, Grandpa, and Historia. “We’ll stop searching for Armin Arlert” she added. “Okay. I’m in” I said.

The brunette suddenly claps her hands that made us jump. This woman is weird and her hair is messy. “Okay! We’ll introduce ourselves to you, Evan. Welcome to Titan Academy, I’m Hange Zoë. I’m a professor, a scientist and a trainer!” she said with a big smile and quickly walks towards me, offering her hand for a handshake. She seem nice, so I accepted it. “That blond man is Moblit Berner. He’s also a professor and a trainer” she pointed and Moblit waves, I waved back.

The pale woman stands, “I’m Kuchel Ackerman. The Head of the Academy” she said while giving out a warm smile. Then she pointed at the man with a cowboy hat, “This is Kenny Ackerman”. I look at the man, he gave me a scary smile that brought chills down my spine. He’s suit for a serial killer.

“Titan Squad, Introduce yourselves” hange said.A brunette in ponytail stands, “I’m Sasha Blaus, I’m the healer of the squad. Nice to meet you” she said while smiling. I smiled back. This isn’t bad than I thought. Then the bald one stands, “I’m Connie Springer. Support of the squad” he said while smiling a bit and nods. I nodded back.

The horse—I mean the two-toned hair guy stands, “I’m Jean Kirstein. Support of the squad” he said blankly, he really looks like a horse. Then the short hair girl stands, “Mikasa Ackerman, Deceiver of the squad” she stated like Jean’s.

Then the tall one lifts his cold gaze at me, “Rivaille Ackerman. Captain of the squad” he said Coldly. Shivers in my spine again. My head suddenly aches and I lost my balance. Thankfully, Hange got me, “Hey, Hey? Are you okay?” She asked. “Yeah… I’m fine”.

It felt weird, like he’s familiar to me. Like I’ve known him before… Enough with this, maybe this is the result of my lack of sleep these days. “Are you sure?” she asked again, worry in her eyes. I nodded, I don’t have the energy to answer anymore. I need to rest. A decent sleep.

“Okay. Let me show you to your quarters. You must be really tired from walking” Hange said. Her arm is still on my back to keep me from falling and led me outside the room. Before the door closed, Rivaille started ranting to Ms. Kuchel. He thought I’m weak? That I’m just a burden to the squad?

I’ll show him who’s weak.


	3. Telekinesis

While we’re walking through the hallway, Hange stated the rules about the academy. She also talks about the seeker thing. I will be replacing their current seeker, They has a problem in their heart. Participants who have conditions are not allowed to play. Hange also briefly explains about the game, we’ll be killing, surviving, and take home the Cup.

“This is your quarters, Evan” hange said grabbing the knob, “Tada!”

The room is all black and white, but luxurious and fancy. We walk inside, “Do you like it? Beautiful, right?” she said leading me in.

“Yeah, it’s really beautiful. Is this really mine?” I said, still having doubts. In my filthy state, I won’t sleep in here.

“Yes,” she said. She then look at me from head to toe, “and.. You need a bath, Evan” while apologetically smiling. I’m so embarrassed at my state right now. When she snapped her fingers, 2 servants appeared.

“Please, Clean Mr. Kruger. I’ll need him clean” she told the servants. “Uh.. Ms. Zoë, I can take care of myself—”.

“No No No, Evan. Someone should help you” and then she pushed my into the bathroom. Before I can protest, the servants is already stripping my clothes off swiftly, leaving only with my boxer. I blushed. Don’t they know the word privacy? Before they’ve put me in the tub, they scanned my whole body, like their measuring something.

After that, I’m already inside the bath tub with warm water. They put some liquid thing in the tub and then the water started to bubble, with that, the servants started scrubbing my body and every inch of it. Not too harsh, not too light, just right. I think this the best bath I had in my life.

They won’t let me do a thing, so I just relaxed. After minutes of scrubbing my body, they started with my tangled and messy hair.

The shampoo they used smelt like cinnamon and honey. I like it. Speaking of which… How are Armin, Grandpa, and Historia? I hope they’re safe right now. When will I see them again? I miss them already.

Snapping out of my train of thoughts, “You’re clean now, Sir” the servant said. They gave me a bath robe and I got out of the tub. When I saw a full-length mirror, I stared at myself. I look soft and clean. Unlike before. The tiredness I felt earlier was gone and just a bath change my appearance a bit. From dry skin to soft ones. My teal eyes are vibrant. My hair is smooth but still messy.

“You look like a girl, Evan” Hange said when she saw me and gave me a big smile. I just smiled back, it’s normal to me, some people in town even mistaken me as a girl.

She looked down at her wristwatch, “Oh shoot, I need to go, Evan. Just wait for me in here, okay?” she said. I nodded, with that, she strode out of the room.

Then we’re back in the bedroom, they started to cut and clean my nails. After my nails, is my hair. In front of me is a mirror, “Do you want us to cut your hair, sir?”

“No, it’s enough” I said, touching my hair. With that, the other servant gave me a neatly folded clothes, “This is your uniform, sir. We’re just outside if you need guidance and tell us when you’re done” Then they disappeared.

I started putting on the black pants with a black leather belt. Then buttoning the white dress shirt. I proceeded down on tying the shiny black shoes. Thankfully, everything fit and comfortable to wear. I don’t know how to tie the neck tie, I might choke myself. So I called out the servants. In seconds, they’re inside. A servant help me with the necktie and the other help me to wear my coat.

After the finishing touch, Hange busted in through the door. “Are you done, Evan—wow.” She suddenly went silent.

“The uniform really suits you. You look amazing!” she squealed so loud that I covered my ears. “Thank you” I said, blushing.

She took a glance at her wristwatch, “It’s already 4 in the morning,” she stated. Really!? It took us hours to clean myself? “we should go to the training room now” with that, she grabbed my hand and lead me out of the room.

We strode down through hallways and passed so many doors, and some huge portraits and paintings in the walls. We then stop at a black steel door that led to a dark stairway. There were no lights or torches when we got down so I held Hange’s hand, afraid that I’ll get lost.

Minutes of walking in the darkness, Hange pushed a steel double door. The whole squad is already inside but there’s another mysterious man. He has a blond hair.

“Oh Mike! Finally, you’re here. Let me introduce you to our new squad seeker, Evan Kruger” Hange said. I awkwardly smiled at the man but he walks near me and sniffs me.

He scrunched his nose, “Good”, with that, he walks away. I look back to Hange to ask what just happened, “That’s Mike Zacharias. He’s a professor and a trainer. He always do that, it’s not that you smell bad” she said, laughing a bit. Okay, that’s a weird thing for a person to do.

“Titan Squad, Line Up!” Mike shouted. They started lining up facing Mike, with their backs against me.

So I started walking towards Sasha’s side. Their eyes darted towards me, confused. “You should be beside the captain, Evan. Since you’re the seeker” Sasha said with a slight smile.

Without a word, I nodded and strode towards Rivaille’s side without looking up to him. Now I’m between the Ackermans and I feel so small.

“Good Morning, Titan squad. I’m Mike—” he was cut, “Tch. We already know, just go on explaining the fucking game” Rivaille said.

“Okay then. The Game is like a race that includes killing and surviving to win the cup. You will be keep in an Island for three days,” before he can continue, I interrupted, “Three days!? How can we survive?”

“You must find a way, you’ll die if you won’t. You still have 10 months to prepare, starting today. The island have different kinds of dangerous creatures. You all have abilities, that’s your defense.” He said.

“Who’s team got the highest points wins. But if the team has incomplete members when tallying points, even they’re leading in the score board, loses” Hange added. “We’ll explain everything but let’s find out Evan’s ability first” She said, then she gestured me to sit in a black leather seat.

I followed and sat comfortably. Then she attached some weird small square things in both of my temples. “Do you already know your ability, Evan?” she asked. “No, I don’t”. With that, Sasha brought a tray that has a syringe with a black liquid inside the barrel. 

“I need you to calm down, Evan. Just breathe in and out, okay?” she said and I just nodded. I’m really not a fan of needles, just the look of it makes me want to run away. So I did what hange said. Breathe in… Breathe out…

Hange mumbling encouraging words to me while settling the syringe in my neck. I hissed when I felt the point of the syringe dug in my flesh. After seconds, she pulled out, “This small baby will identify your ability” she said while patting a small machine beside her.

The machine started shaking. I freaked out, I looked at the people in front of me but Hange and Sasha only gave me a look that Everything is okay.

Minutes had passed, that felt like forever, the machine stopped shaking and a paper slipped up from the machine. Hange grabbed the paper and her eyes sparkles when she read it. “Your ability is… Telekinesis!”


	4. There's no turning back

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter may be confusing but don't hesitate to ask questions :)

“Telekinesis?” I asked.

  
“Yes! You can move or control things without touching it. This ability is kind of powerful,” Hange said with sparkling eyes. She then unattached the weird square things from my temples.

I stand up, but dizziness hits me. “Here, drink this. It’ll ease the dizziness” Sasha said and offered me a glass of water, So I thank her.

“Titan squad, please have your seats” Mike spoke, gesturing the horizontally arranged chairs facing a blank black board. I didn’t noticed the chairs a while ago, Maybe they used their abilities.

I stared at my designated chair and tried to make it float or move. I squinted my eyes, This got to work. But.. No movements. Well, I need to practice and learn to use my own ability. I’ll show them that I’m not a weakling. 

“Oi, Sit down” Rivaille snapped beside me. I looked at him and he gave me an annoyed look. “Are you just going to stare at the chair all day?” he asked, raising an eyebrow. “Uhh.. I’m sorry” I said, quickly sat on the chair. I can feel the heat in my face out of embarrassment. 

“Okay! We’ll explain about the game. As we said earlier that you will have your game at an island with dangerous creatures for three days. The game is like a race but you will kill to get points and lead in the score board, and just a reminder that the scoreboard only shows the name of the school who is leading. In the beginning of the game, you will be dropped from above to the sea and you’ll swim to the shore. I know you all know how to swim,” before Hange can continue, “But… I don’t know how to swim…” I shyly admit. Jean snickered but Mikasa immediately elbowed him. 

“Aw, Evan. Thank you for admitting, you don’t need to be shy. We’ll deal about that later, okay?” she said and I nodded. I had to admit that I can’t swim, I might drown even the game had just started. I don’t want that to happen.

“After you swam to the shore, you need to rest a bit first and then the real game starts” she then posted a map of the Island vertically. “The first team will be drop is Titan Squad, but you will be drop one by one. The finish line is at the north end of the island,” she said, pointing the upper part. 

“In the north end or finish line, you’ll see ten lifts. The black one is yours and then you’ll also see a touch screen inside the lift to tally your points. Once you are done tallying your points, the lift will lift you from the sinking island. The last 2 hours of the game, the ground will shake. You all are going to start from the South. The island may be look small but it’ll take about 2 days before you get to the north or finish line,”

“How will we get to the north in time? Running?” Jean Interrupted, everyone grunted. “Oh, about that… Yes, you’ll be only traveling by feet. Of course, you need to rest too! Unless you’ll buy a maneuvering gear that can make you fly, that’ll cost 5000 points” I would rather travel with my own feet. 

“Since you will be drop one by one, it’s yours to decide or the captain’s plan to wait or to go on your own. Other than your abilities, you’ll be bringing some daggers, Swords, and a bow with a poisonous arrows”, Mr. Mike then pushed a wheeled long table in front of us with so many daggers, swords, and arrows.

I scanned them one by one. Sharp, shiny, and dangerous looking weapons. I feel excited and nervous at the same time. I will learn how to handle this weapons, I have to survive the game. 

Hange then explained about the weapons. We can also buy some weapons and healing potions while we’re in the game but it’ll cost our points. 1000 points for 3 daggers, 1000 points for 1 sword, 2000 for 2 poisonous arrows and 3000 points for Healing potions. 

“To increase your points, you need to kill. Of course, you will still earn points if you kill a dangerous creature, you could not avoid them, you’ll earn 200 points each creature. If you manage to kill a Healer, you’ll get 400 points. 250 points for Supports. 350 for Deceiver and Seeker. 500 for the Captain” Mike explained. 

"Just a reminder that you can’t bring a dead body in the lift, your team will be disqualified. Even the dead person means to you, you need to let go. If you don’t want that to happen, fight and fight. The game doesn’t care if you’re hurt, just survive” Hange said. 

“10 schools will be participating this year, 5 from this country and 5 from outside the country. This country, Titan, Rose, Uni, Marley, and Sky Academy will be participating. Last year’s game, we won and got our 30th cup by Erwin Smith’s squad, former Squad Captain” 

“Next, I’ll introduce you to the students from other academies that are chosen to play this year” Hange removed the map from the board, Mike and Moblit sticking pictures of students in the board. I look at the pictures one by one, some faces are smiling, some are emotionless, and some have Mischievous smiles. 

"First, let’s start with Rose Academy. The Captain this year is Karma Akabane.” Hange said while pointing at a picture of a Red-haired guy with a Mischievous smile. Jean suddenly made a Whistle sound and from the corner of my eye, I saw Rivaille shoot a glare at Jean. 

“The seeker is Rico Brzenska. Isn’t she cute?” Hange exclaimed while pointing at a girl with a silver hair and an oval-shaped glasses. “The deceiver is Neo Collins, I’m really proud of this boy, he finally accepted the position. The Support 1 is Nagisa Shiota, He’s a boy, okay?” Hange said, pointing at a guy with blue hair in two cute ponytails. 

“They still don’t have a Support 2. Last, the Healer.” Hange finishes while pointing at silver-haired guy with a relaxed expression. 

“Next, we have here, Marley Academy. Their captain this year is Reiner Braun. Their Seeker is Annie Leonhart. Their Deceiver is Colt Grice. Their Support 1 is Porco Galliard and Berthold Hoover being the Support 2. Then, their Healer is Pieck Finger”

“Third, Uni Academy. Their Captain is Riley Cross. Their Seeker is Hanni Dreyse. Their Deceiver is Marco Bott. Their Support 1 is Flint Foster and Marlin Freudenberg being the Support 2. Their Healer is Lucilla Longbottom”

“Last, Sky Academy. This school is not known but they have incredible and unique students,” 

“Their Captain is Victorious Ender, You better watch out for this guy, Rivaille” Hange said while pointing at a Violet-Haired guy with a kind smile and then her gaze turns at Rivaille who have a bored expression. “He’s just a piece of cake to me. It’s not like I want to kill him, unless he does something.” Rivaille said, folding his arms. What a confident bastard. “He may look like an Angel, I swear, Rivaille” Hange said, widening her brown eyes, like she’s scaring Rivaille. 

“Yeah. Yeah, whatever” Rivaille said while rolling his eyes. I stared at him, I really can’t wipe the feeling of familiarity, like I’ve known him. When he felt that I’m staring at him, I immediately averted my gaze to the board. Hange continued, “Their seeker is Skye Yuu. Their Deceiver is George Grime. Their Support 1 is Olympus Granger and Fritz Malfoy being the Support 2. Their Healer is Yazuka Haddess” Hange finishes. 

“When you’re already in the game, you must not feel guilty for killing. You did it because you want to survive in the island, they have chosen their destiny. It’s no one’s fault to kill in a survival game. If they don’t want to die at a young age, they wouldn’t choose to play. The game is about surviving. I wish you all good luck” Mike said with a serious tone.

  
I need to kill, huh? **There’s no turning back.**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How was the chapter? Confusing? I'm so very sorry. Some characters of this chapter are not mine, credits to their rightful owners. I include them, because... Why not? If you have questions, please ask me :)


	5. Uh Oh.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Translation:  
> "Rivaille! Descendre ici, cet instant!" = Get down here, this instant!  
> "Maman, aide..." = Mom, help..  
> "C'est bon, mon bébé. Descendre, maman va vous attraper" = It's okay, my baby. Get off, mom will catch you  
> "Mon bébé, réveille-toi maintenant" = My baby, wake up now
> 
> Correct me if the translations are wrong, I used google translate and they suck at translating. ¬_¬

“Okay, that’s it for now. You’ll need to take breakfast first since it’s already Six” Hange stated, looking at her wristwatch. Then we started standing from our seats.

Connie suddenly put his arms around my shoulder, “You look good in our uniform, Evan. I bet girls will drool at you” he said, with a playful smile. Jean added with a smirk, “Maybe boys too” Rivaille then shoot a deathly glare at Jean who laughs anyway. This boy needs to dig his own grave.

“Yeah. The first time you step in here and looking like that made us surprised and amazed” Sasha said while laughing a bit and we started walking, exiting the training room. I didn’t notice their expressions when I step in. “Thank you…?” I hesitantly said, while smiling nervously.

“We’re sorry for our treatment a while ago, Evan. You’re not bad yourself” Mikasa said, with a blank face. That made me wonder if she’s sincere with her sorry or not.

“It’s okay. What are your abilities anyway? I’m kind of curious..” I asked.

We’re now in the hallway full of students who has the same uniform like ours. The people in the hallway have mixed expressions in their faces. Some are disgusted and murmuring to others ear, and some are confused. They made a way for us, thanks to our captain who is leading the way, glaring when someone gets on the way.

“My ability is I can heal, obviously, I’m the healer” Sasha said. “Mine is Frost, I can froze things” Connie said while putting his cold hand on mine and froze it. I started to panic when he really froze it and my right hand is engulfed with ice.

Then Rivaille suddenly turned to us, “You do know that the use of ability outside the training is prohibited, Connie!” Rivaille shouted that made us jump. Connie looked down and muttered “Yes, Captain. I’m sorry, Evan” and look up to me.

That won’t unfreeze my hands, damn it. “How can I unfreeze my hand?” I asked. Rivaille gave me a look, “Sasha, bring him to the hospital wing. Breakfast starts in 30 minutes” he said and turned to walks away, followed by Mikasa and Jean.

“I’ll come with you. I’m really sorry, Evan. I didn’t mean to freeze your hand” Connie said, I just nodded. I think he’s just carried away.

We walk through unfamiliar hallways. “You should’ve think before you’ve done it, Connie. Now, captain’s upset, luckily he didn’t kill you” Sasha said, swatted Connie’s head. “I’m sorry. I’ll consider myself lucky today” he sighed.

“What are the other’s abilities?” I asked, curiosity didn’t leave my system and I still can’t move my fingers.

“Jean’s ability is Electricity. Mikasa’s ability is Manipulation. And as for the captain, we still don’t know, even Jean and Mikasa. Only Mr. Kenny and Ms. Kuchel knows his ability” Sasha Said.

“I heard that Captain’s ability is powerful that it can destroy a whole country” Connie added, shivering. That sent shivers to me too, He really shouldn’t be the one to mess with but he just heard it from someone, doesn’t mean it’s true right? I hope so.

When we arrived at the hospital wing, we saw Hange finding something on a desk, she didn’t noticed our presence. So Connie cleared his throat and Hange jump out of surprise, “Shit! Oh? Darlings? What are you doing here?” she said, pushing her glasses up.

I raised my frozen and cold right hand. She immediately grabbed it, “Who did this to you, Evan?” she asked, worried. “Uhh.. It’s me, Professor Zoë” Connie said, while looking down, feeling guilty.

“It’s okay, Connie. It’s not a big deal, really” I said, now, I’m the one who is guilty.

“Okay Okay. How about you two go on first to the mess hall, hm?” Hange said, “But what if Evan gets lost? We don’t want to be in Captain’s To-Kill list” Sasha said, terrified. I bit my tongue to stop myself from laughing at Sasha’s face.

“Don’t worry, I’ll walk him to the mess hall. The defrosting process will took 20 minutes, you two are already hungry right?”

The two hesitates at first but gave in anyway. Connie and Sasha gave me a nod before they walk away. Then, Hange guided me to a bed.

“I forgot to tell you, Evan, that you don’t need to worry about studying here. But you’ll be training all day, weekends will be your rest days” She said while putting some liquid in my frozen hand.

“Oh! About swimming, I assigned Rivaille to teach you to swim” she exclaimed while smiling widely like it’s best news she received.

Oh no. I flushed of thought of being taught how to swim. Damn it! Of all people, why Rivaille?

“Oh hoh, You’re blushing, Evan!” She said and laugh out loud. My blush grew. “So cute! This weekend, prepare, okay?” she said her smile wide.

My nervousness had increased and so does my heartbeat that I can’t breathe. Sweet ass of Sina.

“Hey! Calm down, Evan. He isn’t going to eat You. And Your hand is good now. Let’s go to the mess hall now, or else, you’ll miss your breakfast” she said and then I stand up. I look at her, she’s still smiling widely.

I breathe in and out, calming myself. I close and open my hand, to check if it’s really okay. Once I calm myself down, we head out from the hospital wing to the mess hall.

“Uhh… Ms. Zoë?” I asked. She turn her head towards me, the smile never faded, “Yes?”

I was about to spill the question I want to ask but Moblit suddenly came running towards us, “Hange! Sawney and Bean got out from their cages” he said while panting.

“What!? Uh Evan? Can we excuse ourselves? My babies got out from their cages” she said while looking apologetically at me. “Wait, can you first tell me where’s the mess hall? And who’s sawney and bean?” I asked.

“Just turn to left. It’s a very long story, Evan. We got to go now! See you later!” she said while running away and left me alone in the empty hallway. I’ll just go then, I’m getting hungry.

When I turned left, I saw a wooden double door, I guess this is the door of the mess hall. I started to walk to the door and pushed it open.

I want the ground to swallow me whole when everyone in the room averted their attention to me.

Connie, on the other side, waves at me. I raised an eyebrow, confused. He then gestured me to come to their table. The table looks special and different from the other tables. In the table, there is my squad. I thought came in my head and chose to ignore him, finding an empty table. When I found one near a garbage bin, I walk towards it. People inside are dead silent, watching my every move.

I sat at the table I found and held my breath because of the smell. The people around me gasp in horror. Connie whisper shouts my name but I still ignored him.

Suddenly, someone, in my back, harshly grabbed the collar of my coat, “You’re testing my patience, Kruger” Shit.

He dragged me out mercilessly. What I noticed in him was the veins in his hands are black. When I look at his eyes, they were pitch black. Is this how I die?

When we arrived at the training room, he then pushed me hard to the other side of the room, opposite to him. Now we’re face to face. I stared at him with horror. He looks scary and black blood dripping from his palms. “You made it to this point, Kruger. Prove me that you are not weak” he said with deep dangerous voice.

What!? Is he crazy? I still don’t know how to use my ability! I can’t even move a chair!

Darkness loomed around us and I started tremble. What am I going to do? I really shouldn’t have done that. Now, I’m dead.

The door suddenly opened, Connie and Jean came running beside me. “Uh oh. At this moment… We got to run” Jean said while staring at Rivaille in horror.

“Connie, get Ms. Kuchel upstairs. Rivaille is not himself right now” Jean turned towards Connie who is now pale. Without hesitating, Connie ran out of the room. “You should have sat with us” Jean said, annoyed.

Rivaille growled, then he floats from the ground and it started to wind harshly, things scattered on the floor. I want to move but my body stopped working. So is Jean.

And it felt like minutes, the wind started to sped up. My heart starting to ache looking at Rivaille’s State. I don’t know what the fuck happened to my heart. There’s a side of me that want to go near him and hug him tight.

My feet moved itself and slowly stepped towards him. “What are you doing, Evan?” Jean asked. I ignored him.

Before I can go farther, Jean grabbed me, just in time Ms. Kuchel busted in the room. Worried plastered on her beautiful face. “Levi! Descendre ici, cet instant!” she shouted.

Rivaille turned his attention to the woman and then tears ran down from his empty eyes, “Maman, aide…” he quietly said, hurt. I can’t understand them.

Ms. Kuchel looked hurt after he spoke, “C'est bon, mon bébé. Descendre, maman va vous attraper” she then slowly walk towards Rivaille, Rivaille slowly descends. When she’s beneath him, he fell into her arms.

Rivaille’s body went limp in Ms. Kuchel’s arms. He looks paler than usual. Mr. Kenny then carried Rivaille out of the room. Then everyone started to surround me with their worried face. “Are you okay, Evan?” Sasha started.

I opened my mouth but nothing came out. Suddenly, my vision started to twitch. And everything sound muffled. I can’t understand what their saying but their expression is getting more anxious. A sharp pain struck me.

I can’t take it anymore, I gave in, and it went black.

(x)

Everything hurt. Every inch of my body hurts. The first thing I saw when I opened my eyes is a blank dark ceiling. I averted my gaze trying to find something. I think I’m at the hospital wing because of the beds, curtains and the smell of medicines. When I found a window, I saw the sun is already setting. How long I’m out? I thought.

When I tried moving my arms, I suddenly feel an electrifying pain. I feel like sleeping for years. Before I can close my eyes, I heard the ring of the bell. I think it indicates that it’s dinner time. Again, I tried moving my body. I can’t stay here any longer.

“Eren… Eren…”

I heard someone whispers with a hoarse voice. I look at the white curtain that separates the other bed. Out of curiosity, I sat up, without minding the pain. I carefully reached out to the curtain and sliding it a bit, enough to see who’s in the other side.

There, I saw Rivaille, his face is frowning. Tears running from his closed eyes, he look so vulnerable. This is my damn fault. I shouldn’t have sat at the table near the garbage bin and sat with them. I shouldn’t have tested him.

Especially when I don’t know how to use my ability, I barely move a freaking chair. I don’t even know Rivaille, his ability, and he’s capable of. Now, we’re both ended up in here.

I heard the door creak, I look up to the door. There, I saw Ms. Kuchel slowly walking in, her steps are careful, afraid that she might wake us. Then she closed the door.

I slowly laid back unto the bed and closed my eyes, pretending to be asleep. I don’t have the energy to talk to someone right now. Plus, my head is aching.

“Mon bébé, réveille-toi maintenant” I heard Ms. Kuchel quietly said on the other side.

The door creaks open again and clicked close, another person walks in. Then I heard someone talking but I can’t hear it clearly.

“You sure you want to die, huh? I should call you Suicidal Maniac” a deep voice said. I opened my eyes, and there, I saw the horse face, Jean.

Worry flashes through his golden eyes, “How are you feeling?” he asked. “Worst” I shortly replied.

He then called out Hange, that came rushing towards me. She look like she just woke up, “Oh! Evan, How are you feeling?” she said.

Without answering, I just close my eyes and shook my head. I can feel a bit dizzy. “I’m sorry” I muttered.

Hange looked up to me after checking, “It’s no one’s fault, Evan. Rivaille just got out of control of his temper” she said. That won’t feel me less guilty.

“If I should have sat with them, we wouldn’t end up like this”

“Oh. You’re testing his patience… Just don’t do it again, hm?” Hange realized my stupidity. “Especially you still don’t know how will you defend yourself from your Grumpy Captain” I just nodded.

“Can you stand, Evan? Or I’ll just bring his dinner here?” Jean asked, looking from me to Hange.

“No, I can stand” I said. When I tried standing, I ended up on the floor. My legs aren’t working. When I looked up, I saw Ms. Kuchel chuckled, “You should rest for a bit, Evan. I’m sorry for my son’s behavior a while ago” she said, apologizing. Then, I heard Rivaille scoffing and looked away, the Captain’s awake.

Propping on my elbows, “Son? Is he your son?” This morning, I was about to ask Hange about this, but Ms. Kuchel said it already.

“Yes, isn’t it obvious?” she said while laughing a bit. How stupid I am, it’s really obvious because they look a like. Jean then helped me stand up and brought me back to the bed.

Hange slide out the curtains, “Jean? Can you bring their dinner here? You can also bring yours here, If you want to” Ms. Kuchel said, Jean nodded and exited the room.

“We had a meeting this afternoon, so I’m going to state here of what we had talked in the meeting” Hange started, “The training starts tomorrow. Mike will be scheduled to train the squad tomorrow, don’t worry, he won’t be rough. And all of you are not obligated to study anymore because of the game,”

“You’re all just going to prepare yourself mentally and train in ten months, it sound bored but you’re going to train in different levels”

“That’s bullshit” Rivaille muttered. The woman whacked his head, “Language, Rivaille!”

Hange chuckled, “Yeah. If you still want to learn a bit, Evan, the Academy library is always open. You can also ask guidance from me. And about swimming, we’ll teach you this weekend. I’ll already told you about this, right?” I nodded in reply. “Since the Ackermans have pool in their place, We’re going at Ackerman Manor this weekend”

“Ackerman Manor?” I asked. “Oh, right. That’s where the Ackermans live. The location is a bit far from here and it’s deep in a forest. You’ll see it this weekend” Hange said and winked.

After some time, Jean and the others Arrived with trays of food in their hands, I think they’re planning on eating here.

“We want to eat here, we feel empty without the Seeker and Captain sitting with us in the mess hall” Connie said while sheepishly grinned.

“Tch, you’ll make the hospital wing dirty” Rivaille said while receiving the tray from Jean. While I received mine from Mikasa. “You’re all a messy eater”

“Don’t worry, Captain. We’ll clean up after” Sasha said. Then, they all sit on the unoccupied beds with their trays on their laps.

“Hange? I guess we’ll leave them for bit,” Ms. Kuchel said, Hange nodded. “Eat well, hm?” she then kissed Rivaille on his forehead and head out with Hange.

We all laugh when Rivaille blushed, but our laughs died out, except Jean’s, when he shot us a deathly glare.

After that, we all just ate in a comfortable silence. I like it.


	6. MANOIR D’ACKERMAN

My first week here in the academy is good. After the incident, we trained. Moblit and Hange taught me how to use my ability, I learned fast. I can move and float things now. Books, chairs, and more.

But aside from just moving and floating things, there’s more to discover about my ability. That made me love to learn about my ability. Hange and Moblit go slow with teaching me about my ability, there’s a possibility that I will get hurt from the lack of knowledge about my ability.

I should not worry about that now. The Academy is mostly empty right now because it’s weekend, some students go to their homes and comes back next week.

We are now walking to the meeting hall with achy bodies to eat our breakfast. These days, we’re training nonstop, only having a 15 minutes break each day and only to be told ‘you’ll get used to it’. Wonderful.

This day is also where we go to Ackerman Manor to teach me how to swim, Kind of excited of that thought. When we arrived at the meeting hall, Ms. Kuchel and the other adults are inside.

When we arrived, we started to walk towards our seats. I took mine beside Rivaille. Since I’m the seeker of the squad, always near the captain.

Then the servants bring out our breakfasts and then we all ate. Ms. Kuchel spoke, “So, how’s your training, Darlings?”. Rivaille scoffed, “We almost died, Especially when it’s Professor Mike’s turn”

Mike smirk and laughed a bit. Well, it’s so damn true. I almost break my arm in physical training. “Yeah, our bodies went jelly, Miss” Connie said after swallowing his food. Sasha just nodded in agreement.

“Mike, you shouldn’t be rough with them” Ms. Kuchel said while having a worried look on her face. “Yes, Miss. I won’t be rough, next time” He said, still having the smirk in his face. I don’t think it’s true. We all saw that, we just sighed. I must survive this training before the game. I might die even we’re just training.

After we ate our breakfast, we were dismissed to pack some things because we will be staying at the Ackerman Manor the whole weekend. I packed some shirts, pants, and under wears. I think it’s enough. Then, I closed my suitcase and got out.

Carriages are already parked outside the Academy and the others are already inside, so I quickly put my suitcase at the back compartment thing of the carriage and proceeded to the carriage where Jean and Connie are in.

But before I can gripped the handle, Jean rolled down the window, “We’re full here, Evan” he said with a smirk. Mikasa and Sasha are also in, only 4 people can fit. I groaned in defeat and proceeded to the next Carriage where the other Ackermans are.

I braced myself, gripping and turning the handler, and I was met a warm smile from Ms. Kuchel and a smirk from Mr. Kenny. Rivaille is looking out on the window, ignoring my presence.

I hurriedly stepped in when the coachman signaled me to get-the-fuck-in-already and taking my seat beside Rivaille. I accidentally hit his shoulder but scooted away afterwards. I felt the blushed in my face, that made Mr. Kenny’s smirk widened.

I tried to distract myself and looked out on the window too. I tried finding Armin in a crowd of people… But he wasn’t there. Did they really leave?

If they really left, I bet they’re in Trost right now, Back at their original home. They’re not originally live here in Sina. We moved here when we’re ten years olds. To be clear, the Arlerts are not really my family but they treat me as one. They found me in crate that floated in the River of Tears at Trost. They were having a picnic at that time.

Thankfully, Armin found the crate and the whole family brought the box in the dry land. They opened it and they saw me, sniffling with red puffy eyes. I don’t know where I came from, even my own name. They found a taped paper in the lid of the box, says _My name is Evan Kruger, I’m six years old. Please take care of me._

I’m very thankful for the Arlerts and treated me as their family. I owe them my whole life.

We passed through the crowded town, we’re now at the main road. The carriage keeps going on that I can see the _Thank you for coming, have_ _a safe trip_ sign by the road. I thought the carriage will continue and pass the sign but just we’re by the sign, we turned right.

Now, we’re entering a forest with a cobblestone path. “Can I open the window?” I shyly asked. Ms. Kuchel gave me an assuring smile and nodded. I’m still can’t believe that her son is Rivaille, they’re completely the opposite.

Without hesitation, I rolled down the window. Scent of leaves, wood, and nature made me relaxed, I peeked my head a bit to look ahead. There, I saw a black grilled gate, on the top of it says _Manoir d’Ackerman_ in cursive.

I gasped when opened itself. Afraid, I hurriedly rolled up the window. Maybe someone casted a spell to open it. I shrugged the feeling off and continued appreciating the forest through the closed window.

As we rounded, I saw a black fountain. Water springing out, making mini rainbows. The fountain is surrounded with Lavenders. Just like back in the academy. 

The Carriage went to a stop, the two old Ackermans got out first and followed by Rivaille and me. The first thing that catches my attention was the huge mansion. The others hoped out from their carriages too. By the front door, there’s an old lady, she looks scary and strict if it weren’t her smile. “Bienvenue à la maison, mes enfants” she said.

“Kenny, mon garçon. Vous devriez rester ici la semaine prochaine” she walked towards Mr. Kenny and pinched both of his cheeks. “Je ne peux pas, maman. Je dois encore entraîner des enfants” Mr. Kenny said, apologetically.

She pouted and then turned to Ms. Kuchel, “Ma belle kuchel, tu me manques tellement” she said and hugged Ms. Kuchel who hugged back. I think this is their mother, Rivaille’s Grandmother.

Then she turned to Rivaille, she pinched and rain his face with kisses. Rivaille just scrunched his face but not pulling away. Our captain looks like a child at the moment. Then she hugged Mikasa.

When her attention are on us, “Oh! You brought visitors! Please, come in” the old lady said, gesturing us to come inside the open door. Before I walked in, I put up a smile and nodded, she replied with a sweet smile.

We walked in, Everything inside looks expensive and fancy. From the diamond chandelier, huge portraits and paintings on the walls, expensive looking carpet. I forgot to mention that everything is clean! No trace of dust.

“Connie, Sasha, you already know where you will sleep, right?” Ms. Kuchel asked. “Yes!” the two replied in unison. Then her gaze turned towards me, “Follow me, Evan. I’ll show you the room that you will be sleeping” I didn’t hesitate and follow her.

“So, Evan, Where are your parents?” she suddenly asked while we’re still walking. At first, I hesitated, “Um… I don’t know… I think they’re already dead when I was just born”. She nodded, “Your last name seems familiar to me, Do you know Eren Kruger?”

That made me stunned, “No. We do have the same last name but I don’t know him, not even a clue” I replied.

We’re now at the end of the hall. She faced me with a smile and opening the door to her right. “If you feel something, don’t hesitate to tell me, okay? Here’s your room, by the way” she gestured the room. The room has twin sized bed, side tables, a closet, and a small bathroom. I walked in, examining the room. The room is also clean.

When turned to her, I also saw Jean, carrying my suitcase by the door. But his clothes are different, the clothes that he’s wearing right now made him look like a servant. “Why are you dressed like that, Jean?” I asked while raising an eyebrow.

“I’m serving the Ackermans, Evan. In short, I’m a servant” he said while walking in and putting my suitcase on top of the bed. That left my mouth hanging and my eyes are wide as a plate. Jean looked at me and laughed afterwards, “I got to go now, Enjoy your stay” he bowed, he smiled at me before he left.

I realized that Ms. Kuchel is still here when she spoke, “Jean’s family is serving my family more than a decade” she stated like a fact, I nodded.

“I have a close friend that looks like you, Evan” she said, while walking out the room, I followed. “Really?” I asked in curiosity.

“Yeah, her name is Carla Jaeger. He has a son but he was kidnapped years ago. He looks like you, but older” she said. “What’s the child’s name?” I asked. 

“His name is Eren. I’ll show you some of his pictures” she said while looking back at me, there’s something on her eyes that I can’t tell. My head nodded on its own. She then climb up the stairs, I just realized that we’re back at the living room but there’s no one, so I followed her.

I think I heard the name from Rivaille. I wonder what was Eren to him. Maybe he is someone special to Rivaille. He cites his name like he miss and longed for him. Well, he’s been kidnapped.

“We haven’t found him, but I believe he’s still alive and breathing” Ms. Kuchel spoke and flashed me a smile. Now, that felt weird.

We’re about to turn to a hallway, “Maman!” a guy suddenly came running towards us. He looks like Rivaille with Glasses. Don’t tell this is actually Rivaille, He can’t just turn into a energetic and enthusiastic.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yep, Rivaille has a twin ;)


	7. Eren

The guy stopped his tracks and looked at me with wide eyes, “Eren? Is that really you?!” he asked, surprised. He took off his oval-shaped glasses and wipes it clean. When he put it on back, he is more surprised than a while ago.

“Calm down, Reville. This is Evan, Evan Kruger” Ms. Kuchel said, that made the other Rivaille face fell. “Evan, this is my son and Rivaille’s twin, Reville”

“Nice to meet you, Evan. I’m so very sorry, did I freak you out?” Reville asked. “uhh.. No, not really. Nice to meet you too” I replied, putting up an awkward smile. His face bright up and held up a hand to shake, and I accepted it. 

“When did you got here?” Ms. Kuchel asked, directed to Reville. “Hours ago. I left nana’s house in the evening, and I arrived here… three in the morning” he replied. That made me curious about him.

Before I can stop my mouth, “So… you’re currently living somewhere? Why?” I asked. He turned his gaze towards me and there’s, I think sadness, glint in his eyes, “uhh hehe… Rivaille and I aren’t okay.. That’s why we lived separately.. For now.. ” he said quietly, I can feel that he’s uncomfortable, so I didn't continue asking. 

“But I still love my twin, and I missed both of my maman and him that’s why I’m here” he added with a soft smile. I just nodded. I think their past has to do with Eren and it’s tragic. “So.. Where are you two going?” he broke the silence.

“Oh, I was about to show Evan how Eren looks like. Going to Rivaille’s room, I think there’s still a mountain of pictures of Eren in his room” Ms. Kuchel replied with a soft smile. Eren really is precious to Rivaille.

“Ah! I also have ones too! Let’s go!” Reville excitedly and then he grabbed my hand to pull me with him. Ms. Kuchel only puts up a smile and shook her head. We walked through a long hallway and then stopped by the last door. “This is my room. It’s kind of messy..” he said while opening the room and walked in. 

It’s really messy, like there has been a storm walked by in his room. Mountains of book are on the floor, disheveled bed, scattered papers on the study desk. Ms. Kuchel then gave him a scolding look, “You should have called someone to clean your room, Reville” she said while putting her hands on her hips, like all mothers scolding to their child do. 

“I'm too lazy! Don’t Evan mind?” he then turned towards me. I mean it’s not really that bad, “No, I don’t mind” I answered, because I’m still curious about how this Eren kid looks like.

“Clean this later” the woman said, Reville only replied a sheepish grin. Reville then skipped to a cabinet and rummaged through it. Minutes of rummaging, he proudly held up rectangular wooden box, it looks old but classy. On the lid of the box, there, carved _Eren._

“Here it is. I treasured this” he said while walking to the bed and sat on it. Ms. Kuchel encouragingly pushed me towards the bed to sit with Reville. I took slow steps, until I reached the bed and sat.

Once I was seated on the comfortable bed, he opened the box. There, drawings and sketches. Reville gave me a sketch of a kid with the biggest happy smile. I think this is him. I gently ran my fingers through the sketch, afraid that I’ll smudged and ruined it. Eren has a messy hair, like mine. Determination and enthusiasm in his big innocent eyes. He looked beautiful.

“I made our chef, who is great at sketching, sketch it for me back then. I still can remember when I begged him to draw Eren..” he said while smiling and shook his head a bit. “There are still more here, but Rivaille’s pictures of Eren are better. He even have a painting of him, I bet he still hanged it up” he added. Wow.

“I can sneak you two in,” Ms. Kuchel offered, playfully smiling. At first, Reville put up a wary look but, “This is your idea, Ma. This idea of yours will be our death.” He deadpanned. The woman just shrugged and laugh lightly, “Let’s go, while he’s still downstairs”. We stood and followed the woman. She opened the door opposite to Reville’s room.

Rivaille’s room is neat and clean, unlike Reville’s. In his room, several paintings are hanged up on the wall, Reville spoke “Just what I expected” and smiled. All paintings are of Eren. There are also incredible amount of paper cranes are hanged up from the ceiling.

“He still even didn’t pull these paper cranes off” Reville added, fondly. I walk towards the wall where the paintings are, “Did Rivaille painted all of these?” I asked while examining the paintings. I realized that Eren and I have also the same eye color. Teal.

“Yes, He spends all his free time painting or drawing Eren” the woman said. “This is the only way to keep his sanity” she added, sadly. Reville, on the other hand, is looking for something, his movements said so, “I wonder where he hid the chest…” he said.

When he looked under the bed, his eyes sparkles, “There it is!” he exclaimed and pull the chest out. First, he dusted it. Then he realized that the chest is padlocked. “Aw, it’s locked. I think he has the key” he said and just pushed the chest back under the bed.

“It’s fine, the paintings are enough for me to see Eren’s face” I said, the woman nodded in agreement. Reville just pouted and stood. But then.. Something’s wrong. I can feel Rivaille coming up!

“Umm.. I can feel Rivaille coming up” I stuttered, then I panicked. Reville panicked too, then he scooted out of the room, I hurriedly followed him. Ms. Kuchel, on the other hand, got out the room calmly and closed it.

When I look at her, she gave me another smile, I think there is something in her smile that I can’t point out. I just smiled back and averted my gaze to the end of the hallway where Rivaille came up. Bingo.

When he turned, he saw us and then he frowned, “What are you doing?” Rivaille asked, getting suspicious. Ms. Kuchel, saving our asses, spoke “Nothing, we’re just showing Evan around”. Rivaille stared at us but shrugged anyway.

“The pool is ready, Evan. Go downstairs with the others” Rivaille said while walking towards where we stood. I stare at him, like forever, if Ms. Kuchel didn’t grabbed my arm. I immediately nodded, realizing what I did, I think my cheeks are tainted crimson red, “Yes, Captain”.

Then we walked away from the twins, when we’re about to step down the stairs, I stopped and looked back to the hallway. There I saw the twins, talking casually. I think they’re checking out each other. Then we climbed down the stairs.

“What do you think about Eren?” Ms. Kuchel asked while we’re walking towards the back door that leads the backyard. “He’s beautiful. He looks innocent. I think I like him already, I bet he is energetic and stubborn” I said with fondness.

The woman chuckled, “Oh yes, he is. Back then, he’s active 24/7, plays every time” she said with adoration. Poor Eren, I hope he’s still alive, I would be really glad to meet him.

Ms. Kuchel opened the door and gestured me out, “Go, Evan. I still have to check out my twins” she said with a smile then walks back. I slowly nodded while turning my head to look outside. There, I saw Connie and Sasha are already in the pool, splashing at each other. Jean, still in his servant uniform, and Mikasa talking, Mikasa is on the pool and Jean sat in crossed-leg near her. 

Suddenly, Hange jumped in front of me, “Shit! Ms. Zoë, what the hell? You scared the life out of me!” I exclaimed, I almost raised my hand on her. “Aw, I’m sorry, Evan! But you must change now, so that we can start” then she handed me a wetsuit. 

“Where am I going to change?” I asked. She gave me a confused look, “Here, of course!” she exclaimed.

“What!?” with matching frustrated sound. Hange laughed and then she pushed me inside, "Go change in your room, Evan, I'll be waiting here" she said, I nodded and ran off. This day might be fun.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yoohoo~ What's your thoughts about this chapter? I would be glad to know. For your information, I'm just a new writer, if you're wondering why I have mistakes in the past chapters. I would always feel nervous when posting a chapter, I think it will suck and the readers will hate it. And English is not my main language everybody Hahaha expect some grammatical errors. Okay, that's all! have a good day/night and keep safe! :)


	8. Heartless

“I think I got it!” I yelled happily, kicking my legs rapidly in the water while Hange is holding my body. I kicked and kicked until my legs ached. “Evan, Slow down!” someone behind me shouted. 

“Okay, I’m going to let you go, Evan” Hange said while slowly loosening her grip. I panicked, “Wait!” I yelled but she already let go. I scrambled to get a hold of her but I realized that we’re on a 4 feet pool.

Then I heard everybody laughing at me, I blushed. Hange’s laugh slowly went off, “You still need more practice, Evan. This is just a 4 feet pool, the sea is deeper than 4 feet. Understand?” she said, I nodded and we started again. 

Hange also taught me how to do backstroke. I failed and failed, that my ears got filled with water. I also drank the pool water by accident. Sasha, Connie, and Mikasa also helped me by guiding me.

Hours have passed, Hange told us to get out from the pool and eat. We’ll just continue our swimming session in the afternoon. When I got up from the pool, my body looked terrible. My skin is wrinkly and my hands and feet are like prunes.

Jean then gave us a towel, and I immediately accepted it. It’s cold that I shivered, even the sun is high. Then I saw table was placed in a shady area and a lots of foods are already served in the table. Sasha and Connie dashed to the table and dug in, they look like they haven’t eaten in ages. The others just laughed, like they’re used to it. I will get used to this anyway, since I’ll be with them for a while.

I followed them to the table and sat. The Ackermans also joined us, and then we all ate in silence, a comfortable silence. Except Connie and Sasha, who munched their foods like they want all the people in the world to hear it. 

(×)

After the delightful lunch, maybe hours after the lunch, we jumped in to the pool. I never expected this, but the Ackerman twins are joining us. Reville skipped excitedly to the pool and made a cannon ball jump. Rivaille, on the other hand, walks calmly to the pool, his well-toned body is prominent because of the wetsuit he’s wearing.

“Someone’s drooling over here!” I heard Jean said it out loud that it snapped me from my train of thoughts. I can feel my face beginning to get red, “Shut up, Jean!” I shouted, but the horse face laughs even more.

I think my mind is tricking me or what, because I saw Rivaille just smirk. He smirk! It’s very rare to see him smirk, he’s face is always frowning or emotionless. _What if he smiles?_ I thought. I think smiling makes him look ravishing, even when he’s just smirking, he looks attractive. 

I walk across the pool to where Sasha and Connie are splashing water at each other, “Hey” I said, getting their attention. When they finally stopped, “Hey, Evan. Are you having fun?” Sasha asked. I nodded, “Yes, I’m having fun..” I said with a smile, also hesitating to spill the question that’s bugging me.

“… When was the last time the Captain smiled?” I asked. Sasha and Connie look surprised at my sudden question, but they smile sadly afterwards. “Before Eren was kidnapped, after it, he never smiled. Even we try all the things that makes him happy, his smile never came back..” Sasha said. 

“He became aggressive, harsh, and heartless since that day…” Connie added. It really made a big impact to Rivaille. He really loved Eren Hard. I looked over where Reville and Mikasa having a conversation, while Rivaille is on one of the corner of the pool, looking over his twin with sharp eyes and furrowed eyebrows. It made him looked like he’s furious at Reville. 

Reville turned his gaze towards me with a smile and started swimming towards me. He arise from the water, that surprised me a bit, “Hey, Evan. Can you swim now?” he asked with a smile. “Yes, I think a little more practice” I said with a laugh and averted my gaze elsewhere, I kind of feeling embarrassed for admitting. 

When I looked at him, he looks hesitant and wary. “… I can trust you, Evan, right?” he choked out warily. I gave him a confused look, “Yes.. I can be trusted..”. I don’t know, sometimes my mouth can’t be trusted. If he wants me to keep a secret, I’m bad at it. 

He sighed, “You want to know why Rivaille and I live separately?” he asked. That made my curiosity on fire, I really want to know but I’m afraid of asking, it might offend him. I tried to slowly nod, hiding my eagerness. His face expression went to a serious expression, then he turned his gaze to Connie and Sasha, who is back to splashing water at each other.

“.. I’m really the caused why Eren was kidnapped... ” he mumbled. I had to come closer to him to hear clearly, he said it quietly like he doesn’t want to talk about it, but he opens up anyway. “.. How am I going to start this… It was on one sunny day, they were playing near the river, and I was reading a favorite book of mine at that time,”

“Rivaille told me to take an eye on Eren because he forgot his painting materials, and I casually nodded. I was lost in reading that I didn’t noticed he ran off to who-knows-where” he looked down, very guilty. I wanted to comfort and give him hug but I think it’ll make things awkward. Instead, I just gave him a sympathetic look. I was about to say something but he continued.

“, I just realized it when Rivaille asked me where is Eren. At first, I thought Eren was Hiding or just right around the corner, but when the sun sets, we didn't find him. That’s when he start blaming and threw harsh words at me, he even hurt me physically. That day on, we were separated. But even if Rivaille did those things to me, I will always forgive him” he said, glancing up to his twin and smiled sadly. 

“.. Did you talk about this at some times back then?” I asked, they really must fixed this and accept Eren’s death, or maybe Eren isn’t dead yet but they still need to accept it, maybe he is somewhere safe. Rivaille can’t accept that fact and keep blaming his twin, and maybe, continuing on finding Eren. “No, he doesn’t see me as his twin when we’re talking about that, he may not hesitate to kill me” he said with humorless chuckle. 

But.. “How did you all know he was kidnapped?” I asked, getting confused. He looked up to me with glossy eyes, “.. Someone saw a group of three people holding a small squirming child came out from the forest, not far from here. They said the child can’t scream because he was gagged” I gasped and my eyes are round as plates in horror because of what he said but I composed myself right after. Eren must really felt helpless at that time. I didn’t like where the story is going… 

“When the news got to us, we already know that it was Eren, Rivaille went crazy and having tantrums because he isn’t allowed to go with the band of guards on finding Eren and the three people. Rivaille had to be sedated because his actions became violent” his tears fell and shouldered all the blame and problems. And as I listened to the story, it made all sense to me.

When Reville realized his tears fell, he quickly wiped it off and laughed it away, “It made sound foolish and stupid, but we all still believed that.. _Eren is still alive”_ he said with a glint in his eyes and a hopeful smile. I’m confused but I smiled back at him anyway. 


	9. Duel

I still can’t believe that Reville opened up with me. I know it’s been days since that happened. After he opened up, he just changed the topic like nothing. I feel like he’s going to cry again, so I didn’t pushed him. The line _Eren is still alive_ still feels weird, it gives me creeps, like there's some message or something. Whatever. The next day, Reville is traveling back to where he came from. I’m curious about where he’s currently living, he never said it.

“Jean! Be careful!” someone shouted with a reply “You know that they can’t hear you” that I snapped out of my train of thoughts. There, in front of me, Connie and Jean having a duel. They were surrounded with a huge glass bubble. Jean’s state is his other hand is frozen. Connie, on the other hand, is his whole body is shook, maybe because Jean’s ability.

We’re in the training room right now, having our first ability training. When Connie can feel that Jean is about to attack him, he stomped the floor that made an ice trail to Jean in order to make his feet stuck on the floor but he dodged it. Jean got the chance and ran fast towards Connie. He can run like Armin! He immediately got near Connie, who doesn’t seem to notice Jean near to him because he’s fast.

Then Jean lightly electrified him, I can even see a gold electric bolt, that made Connie shook and fell down. This is just a light training, we can’t afford someone being injured. Hange clapped and Mike hummed in satisfaction, “Good job, Jean! And Connie, you also did a good job but you shouldn’t let your guards down” Hange said, even if they can’t hear her.

The glass bubble is thick and hard to break, so it’s impossible for them to hear from the other side. I even tried to punch, but I ended up with bloody knuckles. Hange took down the glass bubble and a white mist ascended from the ground while the bubble is slowly disappearing.

Jean immediately helped Connie stand up, “Bastard, next time, I’ll take you down” Connie said with humor. “Yeah, like you can” Jean replies with a laugh and brought Connie to a chair. I really love their friendship. I can feel that Jean is sorry of what he did to Connie. I just pulled up a smile and prepare because I’m next.

My partner today is Mikasa, which I must see as my opponent right now. I don’t know what she’s capable of, but I feel a bit nervous and fidgety. “Are you ready, Evan?” Hange asked me. I looked up to her, I think she saw my hesitation, she added “it’s okay, take your time, Evan… Hmmm… why don’t you meditate first? We got all day” she offered.

I think it’s a good idea to meditate to wash off some negative thoughts to avoid messing up, so I nodded. This is my first duel. Hange smiled and she instructed me to sit on the floor cross leg. I followed, when I’m already comfortable with the position, she surrounded me with a bubble, but smaller. After I’m all surrounded, all I could see is white, I can’t see what’s on the other side, even hear from it.

I didn’t waste time and start meditating. I erased all the thoughts that’s bugging me and focused on my breathing. I breathe in and out.

When I felt like it’s already thirty minutes, I slowly opened my eyes. I touched the bubble and it slowly disappeared. In front of me is them, all eyes are on me, then they slowly gave me an encouraging smile, I smiled back determinedly. Connie held a hand and I accepted it, helping me to stand up. I was about to walk but Jean grabbed my arm, “Don’t stare at her eyes” he mumbled. That made me confused but I just nodded.

Then I slowly walked to the middle of the room. Mikasa is already waiting, with her usual emotionless face. When I finally stood the opposite side from her, she asked, “Ready, Evan?” added with a devious smirk. I think she already have a plan for me. I tried my best to be composed in front her. 

Her eyes are.. Deep and manipulating. I shook my head and avoided her eyes. “Mikasa, Evan, are you ready?” Hange asked. I hurriedly nodded, I want to get this over with before I will faint here, just a glimpse of her eyes made me want to give up already.

Hange then made a glass bubble, mist ascended from the ground. When it’s fully sealed, I felt dizzy and suffocated because of the mist, that also made my vision unfocused. Like I want to throw up all the food I ate this morning. But I won’t just lose. I took a deep breathe, exhaled, and faced Mikasa, who is still smirking.

I realized that everything around is white, like from the bubble a while ago, and endless. I averted my gaze straight to Mikasa, who is now smiling, an insidious one. Then in seconds, everything went black, before I can even react. Then screams of help and suffering. I tried to find its source but all I can see is darkness. Then… “Evan! Help!”. I immediately averted my attention at the voice calling behind me. There, I saw Armin being held by guards.

I dropped on to my knees and burst in to tears, “Armin! Please let him go!” I shouted at the guards but it seemed my shouts are deaf to them. Armin keeps fighting and squirming from the guards grasp.

I stood and ran towards them, but it seems like they get even farther from me. I tried running faster again, but I ended up unsuccessful, still can’t reach them. I wanted to go near them and kill those guards. But, instead, I curled up like a ball and rocked my body like an insane person.

This is making me crazy! I already can hear Armin’s scream in agony. I wanted to do something, but I can’t! Like there’s something that is pulling them away from me when I run. All I did right there was watched him get beaten, while my tears are uncontrollably falling. When the guards took out their swords, I immediately covered my ears and closed my eyes tightly. “PLEASE STOP!” I shouted. This is a fucking nightmare.

(×)

When it felt like an eternity, I opened my eyes and the first thing I noticed is that I’m not inside the glass shield anymore. And I’m being carried by someone who is running. I also heard muffled voices, I can’t understand it. I felt weak and drained.

“Hold on, Evan. I got you” it’s muffled but I could still understand, I can even hear the person’s fast breathing. I didn’t replied. Everything around is hazy. I didn’t know where the hell I am or what, but I just clutched tighter to the person.

I closed my eyes for moment, only to be opened by a light. It’s so bright. Am I going to die?

When the person laid my limp body on something soft, I still can’t make it the person’s face, but I reached for the hand. “Please… don’t go..” my voice came out hoarse and more like a whisper. I’m afraid. Afraid that if I’ll closed my eyes, I’ll never wake up again. I’ll never get to see Armin again.

The person gathered my hand and squeezed it, “Don’t worry, I’ll be here” said the person, assuring me. The person’s hands were rough when I held back, but it’s warm and inviting.

Then someone with shaky hands is snaking my body, more like checking for something. My back arched a bit and surprised me when I felt something pointy is injected in my neck. Whatever it is, it’s making me dizzy even more. Everything is swirling that makes my head ache, I can’t take it anymore, I closed my eyes.

“WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT, MIKASA!?” someone shouted out of anger that snapped my eyes open, my vision is fine now, and I realized that I’m at the hospital wing. Then I averted my gaze to the fuming mad Rivaille, the others are in front of him. Including Mikasa, who’s in the verge of breaking down.

“You know, Rivaille, now is not the perfe—” Hange spoke but he was instantly cut by Rivaille. “You don’t tell me what to do,” Rivaille threatened that made Hange taken aback. Then Rivaille spoke directly to Mikasa, “You do know that he’s just new and still learning his ability, Mikasa. You can’t just manipulate him like that!”

Mikasa flinched, but she still tried her best to be composed in front of the captain. I felt guilty, because of me she got bawled out. But that doesn’t erase the fact that she manipulated me, worse, she even used Armin to make me submit. I think it’s too much, I’m just new. Angered and confusion bubbled up inside of me, but I’m holding it back.

Jean opened his mouth, “You don’t have the say to this, Jean, don’t you dare defend her” Rivaille warned. Jean immediately closed his mouth and looked down. “Does she have punishment, Ms. Zoë?” I asked calmly, hiding the anger in me.

Hange thinks about it first, then she said with a serious voice, “Yes, she do have a punishment. She is not allowed to train for 1 week, for violating a rule. You used the extreme level of manipulation on him, Mikasa, you should have took it easy. I’m still training him and I know you know that, he still can’t take that kind of level of manipulation”

Mikasa just nodded and lowered her head more. Rivaille clicked his tongue, “Well? Aren’t you going to apologize, Mikasa?” he asked. Mike interrupted, I just realized he’s also here, “Rivaille, talk about this outside, go back to the training room. Evan needs to rest” he said while gesturing them to get out.

When they’re finally out, I looked out the window, it’s still mid-afternoon. The thought of Armin made me missed him even more. I desperately want to know how are they and where are they now. Are they safe? I hope so. I’m stuck in this hell and today, I got manipulated. I wanted to write a letter for them, but I don’t know where they’re now.

“How are you feeling, Evan? still dizzy?” Hange asked, and in my peripheral vision, she’s sitting a chair next the bed. I replied, “I’m feeling fine”, but empty I thought. My condition is fine, but the empty feeling is undeniable, this is maybe the effect of thing someone injected a while ago.

“Are we still training tomorrow, Ms. Zoë?” I asked. I don’t feel like training tomorrow. The thought of being manipulated again sickened me. I’m not ready.

“Oh! No, there’s no training tomorrow, because you’re meeting your opponents tomorrow, I’m sorry I forgot to announce this to you all. The Rose, Sky, Uni, and Marley Academy chosen students will be here tomorrow” she said, with a tinge of excitement in her voices. This brightened my mood a bit. I’ll be distracting my mind tomorrow. I hope I won’t get the same nightmare when I sleep.

“Later, when you’re feeling better, we’ll be also practicing our greetings!”


	10. Drunk

Yesterday was the second worst day of my life in here, the first one is the day when I tested Rivaille’s patience. Who would be happy of being manipulated and using someone special to you to make you submit and give up? Mikasa is still not apologizing of what she did, but I don’t mind. I just hope in the next duel, she’ll never do it again.

Right now, we’re outside the Academy to greet our opponents. It’s making me feel excited and a bit nervous.

Mikasa, beside me, is dead silent. So as Rivaille in my other side. The only noise around us is the adult’s chats, Connie and Sasha’s murmurs, and the bird’s chirps. It’s only morning.

“When do they fucking arrive? It’s getting hot” Rivaille blurted, getting annoyed. I just rolled my eyes, _what are you?_ _A vampire? The Sun’s not even that high yet_ I secretly thought. This Captain is being a bitch all the time, fussing all the time. It’s not like I’m not expecting that he can be like that. Seems like I’m the only one bothered by it, everyone is already used to this Rivaille.

When I was about to spoke, the huge steel gates opened, I immediately straightened up. A lots of carriages are lined up came in to view, like a parade. The first three carriage that stopped in front of us is colored with red with gold details and a rose is engraved by each door. This is Rose Academy.

The first person who got out was a bald man, he kind of looks scary but he plasters a small smile on his face. Next, is a red-haired guy, who has a care-free smile on his face. As far as I can remember, this is Karma Akabane.

He stretched up, “Wow. It’s been a while since I last stepped in here” he said with a slight yawn, probably tired from their travel. Then he signaled someone from the carriages to come out. The bald man eyed us one by one, also Karma, but their gaze stopped by me. They said in unison, “Eren Jaeger?”

That made me froze up, but Ms. Kuchel cleared her throat, “Gentlemen, this our new squad seeker, Evan Kruger” she said. And then I realized, everyone’s attention are on me, even the one’s who just came out from the carriages. “So.. It’s not the other kid?” the bald man asked.

“No, the kid has a condition. Don’t worry, Evan will catch up in training” the woman replied with a smile. The man just nodded, but Karma is still dumbfounded. Rivaille cleared his throat, it means it’s time to welcome and greet them, “We are the Titan Squad, Welcome to Titan Academy, we’re pleased to have you here” we said and bowed simultaneously.

They all looked stunned and some are amazed, we practiced this greeting yesterday a thousand times, and also the reason why Rivaille have a bad mood today, well, he’s always in a bad mood. He said it was useless, but Ms. Kuchel was there, he have no choice. Then they also greet us back, Karma’s confusion is still readable in his face.

Next, three green carriages with white details and a unicorn engraved in each door proceeded. The weird thing about the squad is that everyone is plastering their emotionless face, except the freckled guy, he looks so innocent and kind, he’s all smiles. But that doesn’t mean I don’t have to watch out for him and let my guards down. This is Marco Bott, he’s a deceiver, like Mikasa.

Next, three dark red carriages with yellow details followed. The terrifying thing about this squad is their Captain has a big masculine body, he’s bigger than Rivaille, this is Reiner Braun. And I almost forgot that their Support 2 is tall like a colossal titan in one of Armin’s favorite book, that’s Berthold Hoover.

Lastly, a three baby blue carriages with white details and an eagle engraved in each door. The odd one is the captain, which is Victorious Ender, is holding a sleeping toddler with the same hair color as his. That left me and my squad stunned, except Rivaille. He looked around, not aware that he’s been stared at, and nodded. When he turned his gaze towards us, he just smiled apologetically and rocked the toddler in his arms.

He looks harmless, but I still remember what Hange said, don’t judge a book by its cover. Victorious may be look kind and harmless, as we all know every person in this planet has a dark side, think about his. The most kind are also the most terrifying when angry or opposed. You shouldn’t mess with the kind-hearted ones, they may feel hurt but they can use it as a strength. Like Armin, when I ripped a page from his favorite book, they can be the most fearsome person you’ll ever meet. Shit, I'm getting paranoid. 

I snapped back to reality when Jean tapped my shoulder, “Are you okay, Evan? You spaced out” he said. At first, I was confused as hell, but then I realized we’re still outside, even Rivaille.

“We’ve called your name for a millionth time, Evan. Let’s go, everyone’s waiting inside.” Rivaille said with an annoyed tone. I rolled my eyes, “You all shouldn’t have waited for me” I said. Rivaille glared at me and the rest laughed, “If I haven’t tapped your shoulder, you’ll be standing here all day” Jean said, still laughing. Well.. It’s damn true.

I rolled my eyes once again and strode away from them. When I was about to turn in to a hallway, Hange came running to me with her hair even messier and she’s panting. I looked at her for moment, confused what to do, “Where’s Rivaille, Evan?” she said, still panting.

I pointed my thumb behind me and started striding again. When I’ve arrived by the mess hall door, everyone is already here. The room was full of laughs and chit-chats. My expectations were wrong, I thought the idea of keeping us in one room is going to be uncomfortable, silent, and risky. I never thought it would turn out like this. 

I walked towards a table near a window, and the good news is the table is empty. I want to be alone right now. When I finally sat comfortably at the table, I sighed in relief, even if everyone is noisy. While I’m humming a song that I always sing to Historia when she can’t sleep, someone spoke behind me, “So.. You’re Evan Kruger, huh?”

I turned to look. Rico Brzenska, the seeker of Rose Squad, took a seat with me. She gave me small smile, “Nice to meet you” she said. I was surprised, I never thought the always impassive girl would be like this. I can feel there’s something wrong with her small smile. I smiled back, “Nice to meet you too, Brzenska” I replied back.

“Oh no, just Rico” she said with a wave off with her small feminine hand, “You seem lonely here, where’s your whole squad?” she asked with calculating eyes staring at me. This girl is creeping me out. I shrugged, “I don’t know where they are..” I said and wandered my eyes around.

I noticed that Karma, Reiner, and Victorious are not here. I was about to ask Rico about the absence of the captains but she spoke, “You really look like Eren” she said quietly. I’m not surprised, I’m getting used to it, but let see what she’ll reason, “Why do you say so?” I asked. She stared at me for a moment, “You must be really Eren. The teal eyes, the dark brown hair..” she slowly said that sent shivers in my spine.

I thank all deities and gods for saving my ass from this weird girl because someone cleared throat behind her. “Excuse us, Rico Brzenska, this is our table and you’re in our spot” Jean spoke. I looked up to him and nodded in appreciation, he nodded back.

Rico looked back and said, “Oh, I’m sorry, my bad. I must go back to my squad now” and bowed before she walks away. I must avoid Rico before she does something unpleasant. “Did she do something to you, Evan?” Sasha asked, worried. 

I shook my head, “No, we’re just talking” I said with an assuring smile to convince her that everything’s fine, _even if it’s not._ The creepy feeling still lingers in me. Sasha seemed convinced and took her seat. When I noticed that Rivaille isn’t with them, I asked, “Where’s the captain?"

“He’s in the meeting hall with the other captains and academy officials” Sasha replied. I just hummed and lowered my head above my folded arms. Yey. This day is going to be fun.

(×)

The whole day, we were just talking, we also introduced ourselves properly to the other participants. BUT we never told them about our Ability, they may take advantage of us. They also didn't tell theirs. I almost exposed mine, thankfully, Sasha stepped hardly on my foot to stop me.

As the night came and everyone is finished with their dinner, the other schools are already bid their goodbyes and started departing. Also, the whole day, I haven’t seen Rivaille, except this morning of course. I am getting worried, I know Rivaille is a bitch, but I still missed his presence, a bit, and I'm getting worried. Why? I don’t know. Maybe he was just at Ms. Kuchel’s office or something.

When I finished washing up and getting ready for bed, there’s this feeling again, back when I felt Armin was in great trouble. I tried ignoring it and put my pajamas on. But when the feeling is potent, it’s really hard to ignore, I swiftly put on a coat, then I strode out of the room.

I let my feet on its own and followed where this feeling came from. The feeling is.. Anguish.. loneliness. Who could this be?

My feet brought me outside, across the wide backyard of the campus, then in the deep forest, until I can see a river nearby. I looked around, then my eyes stopped at a slouched figure. It’s a person.

I heard sniffles and hiccups, the anguished and loneliness feelings came from that slouched person. I was thorn between slipping away or talk to the person. But before I can even decide, the person spoke, “Eren?” the person asked with a broken and confused voice.

When I finally registered the person’s voice, I was taken a back. It’s Rivaille. And he’s Drunk. The alcoholic drink in his right hand says it all and it’s half-empty. I cleared my throat and composed myself, “It’s Evan, Captain. What are you doing here at this late at night?” I asked, staying on my spot.

He looked back at me. His eyes were full of pain. “Oh… It’s none of your business.” He said coldly. Then he stood and started walking towards the river clumsily. “You’re drunk, Rivaille” I said.

“Tch. I’m not drunk. I just want to test the waters if it’s deep or not.” He said, already in the river. I decided to follow the drunk captain, he might drown. When I dipped my foot in the water, I immediately pull it out, it’s so damn cold. How can even Rivaille endured the coldness?

“Come on, Evan, you’re brave, right? You can’t be a coward by just the coldness of the water” he said with a teasing tone. I never thought Rivaille would ever tease like this. I like this Rivaille, the drunk one.

I rolled my eyes, without minding the coldness, I slowly descended in the river. I still need to get Rivaille’s ass out of the river. When the water is already by my chest, I looked up to him, cause he’s damn tall when closer. I was surprised when he plastered an amazed expression. Then he smiled sadly, that left me speechless.

He lowered his head until our faces were inches apart, we stared at each other's eyes. And then... 


	11. Unforgettable

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm bad at writing kissing scenes, I'm sorry! XD

We stared at each other in the eye, he stared at my teal eyes, while I stared at his blue-grey ones. And at that moment, I feel like we’re connected. Then, slowly, he lowered his head until our faces we’re inches apart. We’re so close that I can feel his breath fanning my lips. Before I can even back away, his lips were on mine.

I was supposed to pushed him, but my body seemed paralyzed. His lips were soft as it moves slowly. We aren’t supposed to be doing this. But it really felt right. It’s wrong, but I slowly closed my eyes and I kissed him back. lost conscious of everything, only focusing on the lips that are moving leisurely. Since he’s drunk, I’m sure he’ll forget about this tomorrow. I hope.

When we finally broke the kiss, he stared at me for a moment and then laughs, and left me flushed. I don’t even know what he’s laughing about. Jerk.

(×)

“Rivaille, you’re so heavy! Don’t lean on me or I’ll drop you,” I grumbled while I held Rivaille, bringing him back to the Academy. Ms. Kuchel will get angry at him, maybe including me. This guy is giving me trouble.

Rivaille keeps babbling and babbling, I can’t even understand it. And I hope he will forget the kiss tomorrow. That was embarrassing , but it felt right. Like our lips were fitted for together. And the bad news is he stole my first kiss! Luckily, I didn’t punch him.

We walked through the hallways, hoping we’re not disturbing someone, it’s late at night after all. When we finally arrived at the hospital wing, because I don’t know where his quarters is, Moblit and Hange were there. They were talking, but quietly. When Hange turned her gaze towards us, she jumps out of surprise, “Bloody hell! Evan? What are you doing here? Do you need something?.. Rivaille?” she asked, confused.

Just when I was about to explain what happened to Rivaille, his body went wobbly even more that it’s getting difficult to hold him. Moblit immediately gathered Rivaille’s body to an unoccupied bed.

“We’ve been searching for Rivaille, where did you find him?” Hange asked, while she’s getting something from a cabinet. “I just saw him by the river, he’s drunk” I said, Rivaille immediately protested, “No, I’m not!”

“Can you please call Ms. Kuchel” she asked directly to moblit, who immediately complied. Now, I’m alone with Hange and a drunk Rivaille. “Are you sure that you only saw him? Then why are wandering in that area if you only saw him?” she asked, I can sense the tease in her tone.

“Uhh… Actually.. It’s my ability that brought me to him, Ms. Hange, have you forgotten? I can sense danger or troubles or someone who needs help even if it’s far away” I said. Hange stared at me for a moment and then she chuckles, “Oh, right… okay, have it your way~” she said. I felt weird of the way she said it, but I just shrugged and turned my gaze towards Rivaille.

I thought he was already asleep, but he suddenly spoke up with still closed eyes, “Professor Hange, I want a duel tomorrow with Evan, he’s ready, right?”. I think he doesn’t know that I’m still here. I looked over at Hange, who is hesitant to answer Rivaille. What had gotten to Rivaille’s mind? He already saw how helpless I am with just his cousin, and now he wants a duel with me?

Hange finally replied, “I don’t think so, Rivaille, you already witnessed back in the training room that Mikasa easily defeated him”. I stared at Rivaille, _are you going to kill me because of the kiss?_ I thought. If that’s the reason, he’s the one who made the first move!

I badly want speak but I’ll wait of what he is going to say. “I’ll be easy on him,” he said, eyes still closed. There was a moment of silence, Hange still not convinced if the idea is safe.

Then Rivaille slowly opened his eyes, it darted at me and smirks, a smrik that left me stunned. “You’re here, huh? What do you say?” he challenged. I rolled my eyes, he added, “Don’t worry, I’ll be easy on a weakling like you”

Now, that set my determination and annoyance on fire. This is a great chance to prove him that I’m not a weakling, I almost forget about my other purpose here, other than for the sake of Armin. “Okay, Captain” I said with a determined smile, accepting his challenge.

“Did I missed something?” Ms. Kuchel suddenly asked that made jump in surprise. I looked back at her, did she heard our conversation?. The woman made her way to the bed and whacked Rivaille’s head. I wasn’t surprised, I’m expecting this, her son is being an idiot at the moment.

Then she start scolding her son, but it seemed like Rivaille doesn’t give a fuck. She saw it and just stopped her scolding. Then her gaze darted to wards me, “Thank you, Evan. I don’t even know he’s been drinking and where did he get the drink” she said seriously and softly glared at her son.

Rivaille laughed, a real one, “Uncle got it for me,” he answered sheepishly. From the looks of Mr. Kenny, I know that he likes alcoholic drinks, and I’ve also been seeing him wandering around with a bottle of alcohol in hand. Rivaille added, “He said alcoholic drinks makes the pain go away, but it didn’t. The pain keeps clenching my heart that I can’t breathe, so I drink alcohol, but it still fucking hurts” he said and pounded his fist in the left part of his chest.

It’s still clear that he hasn’t moved on yet, he loved Eren so much that until now, a decade has been passed, he’s still affected by Eren’s absence. He still loves him and continuing the quest on finding him. I could tell that by his pained expression. 

“Don’t worry, Mon bébé. He’ll come back,” Ms. Kuchel cooed and then she darted her gaze at me, and put on the sweetest smile I’ve ever seen in my life. I smiled back. I hope will really come back, I want to meet him. But first, I’ll cheer the captain up a bit.

“Yeah, Cheer up, Rivaille. He’ll come back. We’ve got a duel tomorrow, remember?” I said, even though it would cost my life. Rivaille looked at me and then put on a small smile.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm really sorry about the kissing scene XD


	12. The Seeker versus The Captain

He really did forgot about the kiss. It’s not a big deal, and we aren’t supposed to be doing that. Okay, I admit, I like Rivaille. That kiss was dreamy but it’s still feels a bit wrong.

“Are you sure about this, Evan?” Hange asked for a millionth time. She’s more worried and scared than me, who’s actually going to face death. She’d been asking that question since yesterday. She even made me ate a lot of food earlier when we’re taking our breakfast. She said, I’ll easily faint if I don’t eat enough. She’s being a mother to me!

I checked my weapons one by one. Daggers? check. Sword? Check. Everything is settled. I can feel my hands are getting sweaty and shaky. I shouldn’t feel like this because I accepted his challenge. I could have just rejected it yesterday, but now it’s too late. When the others heard about this, they were totally shocked, even Mikasa. They said, they would never dare to compete, even just practice, with the captain. Only Mr. Kenny could dare to compete him, well, he’s the captain’s personal trainer.

Rivaille told me earlier that I need weapons, so I asked why would I? He just answered me, “I swear, you’ll need it. _Don’t attack if you don’t have anything with you”._ That sent shivers in my spine and increased my nervousness. I know he will not kill me. I’m the official squad seeker. Yeah. Without me the squad is incomplete. _Focus, Evan!_ I thought.

On the other side of the room, opposite of me, there’s Rivaille. He looked relaxed and calm. While I looked like I want to give up already, we aren’t even started yet. Someone suddenly tapped my shoulder that snapped me out of my thoughts, “Good luck, Evan. We will miss you, and We all love you” Connie said that made me confused.

Jean whacked Connie’s head and said, “Seriously, Evan, Good luck”. I laughed, to at least relieved the tension a bit, I can feel they’re also nervous for my life too, “Oh, come on, I’ll make it out alive”. Jean shook his head, “I’ll give you one last advice, Evan, we all know that the Ackermans are really dominant and powerful. Like Mikasa, Don’t stare at Rivaille’s eyes. Rivaille’s ability is stronger than Mikasa’s. Just remember this, the eyes are the bridge to a person’s mind” he seriously said. I didn’t really take in mind his first warning, which ended bad. But now, I’ll take it seriously.

Ms. Kuchel and Mr. Kenny will be watching over, in case if Rivaille will be out of control of his self again. The others are watching us at the sides. And then, I slowly walked forward with a bit shaky legs while Rivaille is watching my every move like a hawk. His stares makes me weak. He then walks forward until we have enough distant. Following Jean’s advice, I took my gaze elsewhere.

Hange cleared her throat, “Are you two ready?” she said with a shaky voice. Rivaille answered, “I’m ready. Evan?” and turned to the question to me. I looked at Hange, who looked back at me with worry in her eyes, “How about you, Evan? You can always back-out” she offered.

I know this is just a simple duel, but it felt like it’s the end of my life. I laughed, they were all confused by that, “It’s fine. I’m ready” I said. Then, without hesitation, she made a huge glass bubble. I covered my nose for a moment, the mist that ascended from the ground makes me dizzy.

When we’re already surrounded, I looked over at Rivaille, who’s just standing, not making a move. I avoided his eyes. I looked over his hand, his veins are starting to get black. I flinched when he said, “First move, Evan” with a different voice, like he’s been possessed by a demon.

With that said, I slowly made the daggers move, without touching it, from the pockets to my back. That I can tell it’s forming a wings in my back, Hange taught me this trick. Before I can even charged the daggers towards Rivaille, everything went black. Not again. How can they even do this? Is there a switch here?

And then, from behind me, I heard a light deliberate footsteps. I slowly turned around. I can make out the figure, there’s something white that outlined the figure. It’s tall and then I took a quick glance at its eyes, it has vibrant purple eyes. I accidentally dropped the daggers because my hands are uncontrollably shaking. I stared at the figure in horror, still avoiding the eye area, What is this?! This is literally not a human (A: it’s more like an ender man in minecraft lol)

Then a smile made up in its face, “Why are you stopping, Evan? We’re just starting..” it said while taking slow steps towards me. I snapped, and raised the weapons again while taking steps back with shaky legs. When it noticed that I’m taking steps back, he quickened its step. With that, I started to run. This is harder than I thought it should be. It really looks terrifying.

I looked back, I think it can catch up with me, blame its long legs taking big steps. Without wasting time, I charged all the daggers towards it while looking back, to really make sure that it will hit right. But it dodged the daggers swiftly and runs even faster, that made my eyes wide out of surprise and shook my whole system in horror. Shit. In the situation I am right now, I can’t remember my goal anymore.

The only thing I have left is a sword. How am I going to used this when we’re still running? I looked back to see if it could still keep up, but it’s already behind me, smiling insidiously. Fuck, I really hate that smile! Is this the Ackerman’s signature smile? Our faces are inches apart that made me stumble and fall. Without hesitation, it devoured me.

(×)

“I told you, Rivaille, he’s not ready yet!”

The first thing heard is a loud voice. It’s Hange. I don’t know what happened after I was devoured by a weird tall creature. It just went blank. This is my second time I passed out from a duel.

“Tch. Can you quiet down? He’s just too terrified, that’s why” then a deep voice said. Rivaille.

I slowly opened my eyes, but abruptly closed because of the light of the room. I think they noticed how my eyes opened and closed, because they went silent. After that, Hange moves closer to me and asked, “How are you feeling, Evan?”. I can feel worry in her voice.

I didn’t answer. I’m really tired of ended up passing out in a duel. My ability is useless if I’m being a coward. Everything that I learned from Hange are nowhere to be found at that moment. My mind was blank.

I pounded my head with both of my fisted hands, but Rivaille quickly grabbed both of wrist, “Stop it, Evan. Look, I’m sorr—” he spoke, but I cut him, “Shut up, Rivaille. You’re not at fault. I made my ability useless, maybe because I was terrified. Let’s start over,” I said, determined to start over again. I won’t give up until I made Rivaille fall. I will prove him that I’m worthy of the Seeker position. Then if I already proved that, I’ll set up another goal. **To win the game.**


	13. Thrilling

Rivaille was taken aback of my choice of words, then he looked at me like I’m some insane person, “What? Your brain is still a mess, Evan, you need to rest” he said while letting go of my wrists. But I didn’t just laid back, I pushed Rivaille, “No. Let’s start again.” I said.

I stubbornly jump out from the bed and walked out, I was supposed to feel pain, but I felt nothing. I ignored Hange and Rivaille’s calls and continue walking out of the room. I don’t want to waste time just resting, I’ve had enough. I know it’s still several months until the game, I don’t want them to look at me with pity whenever I passed out. I hate it.

I strode through the hallways, ignoring the questioning looks of the students. While I was striding the hallways, I came across with Connie and Jean. They asked me if I were okay and where I am going, but I just ignored them.

I stopped midway when I heard the glass windows cracks. The people who walked by the hallway looked at me with horrified face, like I did something bad. What kind of look is that? I glared at them and they immediately ran out of my sight. With the glare, more glass windows cracks even more. But I didn’t care.

I started to strode through the hallway again. Until I’m already outside the training room, “I’m going to prove you all that I’m not weak” I mumbled. Then, I pushed open the door, I didn’t realized that I pushed it too hard. Mike immediately stood up, looking alarmed. While I walked in the room, I noticed the he sniffs something in the air and he scrunched his nose like he smell something horrible, then his eyes went wide.

I ignored his bewildered expression plastered on his face and focused on picking up the daggers and inserted them in the pocket. Not long after, everyone came in and their eyes dropped on me. “Evan, what do you think you’re doing?” I heard Hange spoke but I still ignored her. Can’t they see what I’m doing?

Suddenly, Mikasa turned me around to face her, “Don’t you dare do what you’re thinking, Evan. You--” she stopped when I averted my gaze to her dark purple eyes, like she saw something that’s making her edgy. I’m not even affected or intimidated by her. “Let him be, Mikasa.” Rivaille said with a deep voice.

With that said, Mikasa backed away and let me continue of what I was doing. When I’m already finished, I walked to spot where I am supposed to be, Rivaille is already on the other side. There’s a moment of tensed silence, “Do I need to be easy on you? You seem weak…” Rivaille started talking with a mocking tone.

That made me annoyed. “You can be as hard as you want, Captain” I said with a voice that isn’t like me. Instead of looking aback, he looks amused and then a smirk came up, “Okay, then. Professor Hange? We’re ready” he said.

“I know. But before you start, I must call Mr. Kenny and Ms. Kuchel,” Hange said, Moblit got the cue and walks out to get them. Rivaille clicked his tongue and waited, tapping his foot on the floor. I was irritated at the sound, “Can you just be patient, Captain?” I tried to say it in a calm way, but my words seemed nothing to him and continued tapping his foot impatiently.

Before I can shout at him to stop tapping his foot, Mr. Kenny and Ms. Kuchel walks in. The pale woman have a wary expression plastered on her face, I can say that she can feel the tensed atmosphere, but she didn’t speak to make a stop. When Hange saw them walked in, she started her warnings and whatnots, then she made the huge bubble. I was surprised when the mist didn’t made me dizzy, instead, it’s making me energetic and more alive, that I can feel my pupils dilated.

When we’re finally surrounded, Rivaille didn’t waste time and attacked. He stomped his foot that made black trail quickly and rooted my feet. With anger, I yanked out my foot with full force and also did the other side, I successfully got my feet out. When I looked around, Rivaille is nowhere to be seen, But I can hear his mocking voice everywhere, “It’s that all you got, Evan?” he asked.

With that, the same creature appeared (A:The ender man creature) not far from me and it already has a smile plastered on its face. But now, it’s holding Armin’s body and covers his mouth area to keep him from screaming. I can see the fear in his big blue eyes, it’s calling help. Damn it!

Without wasting time, I raised the daggers I got, but this time, it’s different. I levitated with the daggers. I emitted energy out of me that it’s starting to wind harshly. I never felt so powerful in whole damn life. I expected the damn creature to be afraid or taken aback, but it just smiled even more. It took out a sharp dagger and pressed it to Armin’s exposed neck, it pressed harder that I can see blood seeping out.

That made something inside of me snapped, “I’M GOING TO KILL YOU!” I shouted out of wrath and charged the daggers forwards to my target. I’m so drown with anger that I forgot that this is Rivaille.

Before the daggers even arrived at my target, the glass bubble broke and Mr. Kenny came in to view. He quickly surrounded the creature with a bubble to prevent the daggers from stabbing it. He is too quick that I didn’t have time to react. Then he levitates while his eyes were glowing blue. Without wasting a second, he did something that made me unconscious.

(×)

Everything hurts. My body throbbed. And there’s this feeling that overwhelms me, it’s making me weak. When I opened my eyes, I squinted because of the light above me. When I adjusted, I’m in a unfamiliar room, the only light is right above me. I just noticed that my hands are chained to the chair I’m sitting on.

I suddenly felt scared and confused at the same time. Where are they? Why am I being chained? Did I do something wrong?

I started to struggle from the chains, until I cried out of pain. Seconds later, I heard Hange calling out my name. I replied back with a cry of pain and help. I don’t want to feel like this anymore.

When she finally came in to view, I asked, “Did I do something wrong, Ms. Zoë? Tell me. I… I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt him… ” and I cried even harder. As I remembered what I did, I could have killed Rivaille or the creature he turned in to, if Mr. Kenny didn’t interfere.

Her brown eyes were full of worry, “No. No, Evan. You did nothing wrong” she said while giving my right a grip of assurance, her other hand ruffled my hair and a warm smile plastered on her face, “Rivaille intentionally made you furious so that you can release something about your ability, he knows that you can’t just move things without touching it and read minds, there’s something **Thrilling** about your ability.” She said with sparkling eyes.

I was shocked and speechless of what I’ve heard. Then, I remembered I just levitate. Does making me angry release my true power? And Rivaille did it intentionally? What the hell is he thinking? I could have killed him! I should thank him that he’s willing to risk his life just to make me release something in me by making me angry.

“Be honest with this, How are you feeling?” she asked with a serious yet warm voice. I looked at her, “I don’t feel well. Weak?” I said. My ability really drained my energy. Will I ever levitate again? Or do I have to be angry again to levitate?

“I’ll teach you how to levitate, Evan, without making you angry of course” she said with a chuckle. Hange said that after I was unconscious, Rivaille passed out too, But she added that he was just fine. I’m relieved by that, if he weren’t okay right now, I’ll never forgive myself.


	14. Cinnamon

“I’m really sorry, Captain! I didn’t mean to hurt you!” I said while bowing. When I first saw Rivaille in the bed, I immediately felt guilty of what I did. “Can you stop apologizing? I’m the one who must be sorry for what I did, but I did made you levitate.” Rivaille said with amusement, as I heard pouring sound of liquid in a cup. After I was discharged from the room, it was Hange’s laboratory, she explained to me that I need to be sedated because my ability was too powerful at that time. She also said I don’t need to be sorry because I’m just new with my ability, but I still kept apologizing.

“Oi, snapped out of it, Evan. You’re really not at fault.” Rivaille raised his voice that made me jumped out of surprised, I stood up straight, “but… I almost killed you, Captain” I said and lowered my head. When he didn’t answer, I looked up to him. He made a face, “You keep repeating the same words and we’ll repeat the same argument again, why don’t you have a sit and drink tea with me.” He said while taking a sip from his cup.

I was about to argue, but he glared at me. So I just brought a chair next to the bed he’s occupying, I poured myself a tea and carefully took a sip. As the hot liquid runs from my throat to my through my body, it made me relaxed and warm. The silence was comfortable, but not until Hange suddenly came in. She is surprised when she saw us, “Oh.. Am I disturbing a moment?” she said, then she covered her mouth area, like she saw something adorable. “Yes, you’re disturbing our moment of peace, why are you here? Don’t you have a class right now?” Rivaille asked while putting his cup on the tray.

“No, I don’t have a class right now. Your mother wants you two to come to her office right now” she said, directed to Rivaille and also eyeing me. I’m suddenly confused, why would Ms. Kuchel want me to come to her office? Will I be kicked out? The thought of it scares the life out of me and my whole body shook. Rivaille seemed to have read my mind, “Stop it, Evan. Stop overthinking.” He said while getting out of the bed. I just shook my head and stood up. Rivaille straightened his shirt and swiftly wear his coat. When Hange saw us stand, she then walked out first and we followed.

I was deep in thoughts that I can’t understand what Hange has been saying while we’re walking through the hallway. If I’m going to be kicked out, where am I going to go or live after? The Arlerts aren’t here anymore. Am I going to be a beggar? The thought of me begging for food and money in the streets makes me want to cry. No. Ms. Kuchel won’t kick me out. She’s the one who offered me the Seeker position. It made me sighed, but still. What if she already found a better person to replace me? Maybe she’s disappointed at me, I almost killed her son! I just want to cry right now, I overthink too much. Rivaille suddenly whacked my head, snapping me out of my thoughts, “Stop it already, follow the captain’s order” he growled lowly and walks in. I didn’t have time to react, I didn’t even realized that we’re already outside the office. I really should stop.

When I walked in, there I saw Ms. Kuchel and another woman, they’re talking in a table near the window. I can tell by Ms. Kuchel’s smile that they are very close, I can’t make out the other woman’s face because her back is facing me. When Ms. Kuchel caught the sight of me, she stood up, “Evan, come here, I want you to meet someone dear to me” she said and smiled sweetly. I was confused at first, but I just walked near the women. She tapped the other woman by the shoulder that made her turned to me.

I stopped and froze when my eyes met the woman’s amber eyes. “Eren…” she whispered. That made my eyes wide. As we stared, there’s an electrifying feeling traveled through my whole body that made me dizzy and stumbled back. Then, a sharp pain struck in my head. I closed my eyes tight because of the pain, at the same time, confused.

Hange immediately gathered me in her arms, “Hey, Evan, you okay? Where did it hurt?” she asked. I just answered with whimper, the pain is too much that I can’t even utter a word. As my eyes were closed, weird scenarios popped up in my mind, I can say that these are memories or flashbacks. They were hazy. But there’s one thing that sent chills, It’s a man’s silhouette, he’s holding a syringe, and he has a blue glowing eyes. But it didn't last and it was all black. Who the hell was that?

At some time, the pain abated. When I opened my eyes, the first thing I saw is the woman’s amber worried eyes. “Are you okay, Evan? I should have let you rest first, I’m sorry for this” Ms. Kuchel said, worry in her blue grey eyes. I quickly sat up, “Maybe I need to, but I’m here now” I said chuckling a bit.

The woman looked wary at first, but held a hand to help me stand anyway. And the weird memories… maybe those are just my forgotten memories back then. I just shrugged it off and focus of what I am going to deal right now.

The woman led me to the table they sat a while ago and we sat at it. The other three people also sat with us. When we’re all seated comfortably, the other woman cleared her throat, “How are you feeling, Dear? Are you sure you’re really fine?” she said, concerned.

“I’m really fine, uhh…” I hesitated to continue, what should I call her?. When Ms. Kuchel seemed to notice my hesitation, “Oh, by the way, this is Carla Jaeger, Evan” she said. That made my jaw drop, as far as I can remember, Ms. Kuchel said she has a close friend that is also Eren’s mother, Carla Jaeger. I stared at the woman, she looked like Eren! If he’s a girl.

“You really looked like my son. Did Kuchel introduce him to you?” she asked, eyes full of longing. I shifted on my seat, “Yes, Ms. Carla. She even showed me his pictures” I said. I really can’t believe I’m talking to his mother right now, she looked beautiful as he is. I was about to speak again, but was stopped by the smell of cinnamon, my mouth starting to water.

I immediately turned red when my stomach suddenly grumbled because of the smell. Then a servant put a long plate of fresh and hot cinnamon buns in front of me. My stomach grumbles even louder. Right after, I heard chuckles, “Eat, Evan”.

Without hesitation, I grabbed a handful of buns that are comfortably warm in my hands and plucked it in my watery mouth. When I tasted it, I was left speechless. It tastes so good that I felt ecstatic. This is the best cinnamon buns I’ve ever eaten!

When I looked, Ms. Carla’s eyes were now wet with tears. I stopped and asked, "Did.. Did I do something wrong?" I'm starting to get worried. The woman immediately wiped her tears when she realized her tears fell, "No. Continue eating, Dear. You just reminded me of Eren, he had the same expression as you when I baked him some buns" she said and smiled sadly after.

"Cinnamon buns were his favorite" she added. _These are my favorite too._


	15. Flashbacks

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think this is the longest I've ever written XD. Chapter 15 is up, Enjoy! <3

It’s been months since I last saw Ms. Carla. That made me think that it’s my fault, because I reminded her of Eren. After I ate the whole plate of cinnamon buns, we’re just talking casually. I know that the woman really doesn’t usually visits here, but I just want to see her again, to make sure she’s really fine. I made her cry after all.

It’s also been months since the day was announced the official seeker of the squad. Students still hates me, I can tell by the way they looked at me with the same disgust when they first saw me, but I don’t really care. The game is also fast approaching. As weeks and days had passed, our level of training is also leveling up. They were days that we’re really frustrated and tired, but we all know that this is won’t go to waste if we fight. Our frustration and exhaustion will be worth it in the end if we will fight harder and survive the game. **We won’t die, we’ll survive.** Once we win the game, I’ll surely come back to Armin, Grandpa, and Historia. Where my real home is.

(×)

“Okay! That’s it for today, I’ll give you all a minute to rest and wrap up!” Mike finally announced. We were panting and bathe with our own sweat. Jean and Connie quickly falls on the floor, I also fell down with the two because I really can’t feel my legs at this moment. Today’s training was different and challenging, we had a one-on-one with our trainers.

Mike and Moblit were very difficult to beat, I never thought Moblit could be so strong, I underestimated him. We didn’t successfully beat our trainers, rules stated whoever loses will run for ten laps. With that said, we ran ten laps around the room. I thought it was just easy, but as we ran, the room seemed to expand. Mike is really shitting with us. Sasha isn’t here with us, she’s with Hange right now, they are on a hunt for healing plants and herbs. As for our Captain, he is not with us either, he’s in the other training room with Mr. Kenny.

I got curious of how would the man train the captain, they didn’t say we’re not allowed to watch nor they agree, so I just sneaked out quietly and strode to the other room. I’m almost by the door, but I stopped my tracks of what I have heard. I heard someone’s sobs and it’s coming from the room I’m going to. I took slow steps closer to the door and stick my ear on it.

“Now, look at your palms, they’re damaged. We’re barely even starting, Rivaille. You didn’t take your meds, do you want to get admitted again?” I heard someone growled at the other side. I know eavesdropping is bad and what I am about to do is wrong, but I just can’t stop myself. I slowly pushed the door a bit enough to see what’s inside.

Inside, Rivaille is kneeling on the ground with his body slumped. He looked terrible. The dark circles under his eyes are now visible, he’s even more paler, and his whole body was bathe with his own sweat. Before I forget, he is shirtless, he’s only wearing a pair of pants. But I did not come here for that, I’m here to see how will Mr. Kenny train the captain.

He’s panting and tears slipped down from his tired eyes. When I looked down to his palms, I gasped in horror, they were both damaged and some black thick liquid oozed from it. At the moment, I just want to cry, I don’t know the hell why. There’s this feeling again, the feeling and urge to hug and comfort the tired captain, but I can’t just walk in. Instead, I just watched him silently.

“I’M NOT DEPRESSED ANYMORE! I DON’T NEED THOSE FUCKING MEDICATIONS!” I fell back when Rivaille suddenly shouted. Depressed? I really got confused by that. But… I really shouldn’t be here and stick my nose in their business. So I stood up and left, hoping Rivaille will be alright.

(×)

“Listen up, titan squad, Ms. Carla has invited us to have dinner with them, the Jaegers. So I want you all to shower and dressed up right now, alright? We all know that it’s an hour until we get to Shiganshina Village and it’s already getting dark. So.. Go! You’re all dismissed” Hange finished up.

I suddenly got excited, I will see Ms. Carla again! I immediately jumped out of my seat and ran out of the room. When I’ve arrived in my quarters, I immediately rummaged through the closet. What I just gathered is a shirt and a pair of pants. After that, I took a quick bath and I scrubbed my whole body raw.

When I’m finished, I quickly put my coat on and strode out of the room, I really can’t hide the excitement inside of me. I don’t even know why am I got excited all of a sudden, but it doesn’t matter. When I’ve arrived outside, they’re already waiting for me, I am always the late one.

When they all saw me, Jean and the others immediately rushed to the carriage, even Mikasa. They left me again with no other choice but to ride again with the same carriage as Rivaille, I don’t know why they do that.

When I opened the other carriage, what made me suddenly worry is that Rivaille looks even more terrible than an hour ago, he’s leaning to Ms. Kuchel for support, his head on her shoulder. “is… is he alright?” I quietly asked, he seemed asleep. The woman replied, “No, I told him just to stay here, but he resist.”, then she stroke his silky hair gently with a worried look plastered on her face.

I just sat next to Mr. Kenny, who’s looking outside the window, and closed the door. My excitement a while ago is gone just the sight of Rivaille across me. As the carriage move, I wanted to ask Ms. Kuchel about the depressed part of Rivaille, but I don’t want to offend her. It’s too personal.

“He got depressed since the day Eren was kidnapped.”

I jerk when the woman suddenly spoke. I didn’t know what to answer, I just looked over at her. She continued quietly, “He even attempted to kill himself after he was discharged at the first time he was admitted to a mental hospital. I was so scared that I brought him back to the facility. After the second time he was discharged, he seemed fine… but the pain he’s carrying is still there and acted like he’s strong. No medications can numb the ache.”

I didn’t know why Ms. Kuchel suddenly opened up about this to me, even if it’s very personal. I’m still speechless, I don’t know what to do. “His condition worsen when you arrived. But it’s not that it’s your fault, Evan, don’t think it that way. Just.. Please, Don’t shy away from him, it will hurt him, he grew fond of you.” She said and smiled sadly right after.

That’s when my heart started to race and made something alive inside me. I just nodded and continued staring at Rivaille. When I looked down to his hands to check if the wound was still there, but his palm area is wrapped with gauze. My first impression to Rivaille is he’s a Cold-Hearted guy, someone who doesn’t have emotions. But I was very wrong. I don’t know what’s behind those cold sharp eyes of his. I didn’t know he suffered depression at a young age, his childhood was very depressing, losing someone you loved the most.

By the time we arrived at a Shiganshina village, the sun is already sets. The village was full of pastel colored houses and small buildings as the streetlights illuminated its colors, it’s like you’re in a wonderland or something. The people walking by the streets are on smiles and laughing as they walk, looking they have no problems in their lives. We stopped by a huge pastel house, the front yard is full with colorful flowers, fireflies flies around a tree in the front yard, it looks enchanted.

“Good evening, everyone! Please come in! Sis Carla is still preparing the table, I’ll be the one who’ll guide you in” a girl, I think she’s years older than me, suddenly spoke energetically. She had a short dark hair with a messy bangs and dark eyes. When her eyes darted at me, it went wide and she strode closer to me, making me nervous. “Are you Evan by any chance? You really looked like Eren…” her eyes went glossy and she covered her mouth area with her hand.

“Uh.. Yes.. I’m Evan, Evan Kruger..” I awkwardly replied. Her eyes soften, “Oh.. By the way, I’m Faye.” She said and smiled brightly right after, I just smiled back. She then swing her arm to my shoulder and we started walking together towards the front door, I just noticed that we’re the only ones that are outside. I’m not really the type of person who likes clinging and touching, but as her arms remained on my shoulder, I felt safe and comfortable.

When she opened the door, I was greeted by a bundle of laughs that’s coming from a room. When where by the living room, Faye lets me go and mumbled, “Come, Evan. Feel yourself at home”. And then she skipped towards the group. As I was standing there, my head starts to ache. I don’t know what made looked at the stairs that leads to the second floor, I think someone is calling me, but I didn’t budge.

As I stared at the stairs, I heard a childish voice calling out my name. It’s like I’m being controlled by someone, my feet move itself and brought me upstairs. My feet kept walking until I was in front of door where there’s Eren carved on it. I was confused, why am I doing here?

Without my consent, my hand turned the knob, it’s not locked. I pushed open the door, and I was greeted by a dark room. I slowly walked in, finding something to light the room. By a nearby table, there’s a half-used candle and a match, I didn’t hesitate to light the candle up. It didn’t lit up the whole room, but it’s enough for me to identify where I am in. I think this is Eren’s bedroom.

While I wandered my eyes around the room, something glinting caught my eyes by the bedside table. When I got near the table, it is a small silver infinity ring I saw. I slowly picked it up and examined it. The inner part of the ring is written with words _‘Je t’aime’_ in cursive. Suddenly, a sharp pain struck in my head. It made fall on to my knees and clutched tighter on to my head. It’s the same pain when I first saw Rivaille and Ms. Carla.

Then another wave of pain struck in my head, but it is more painful than the previous, I didn’t know what to do, but to close my eyes. _Someone.. Please.. Help._

(×)

_When I opened my eyes, I was in a forest, same as where the Ackerman manor is located. My eyes immediately went wide when my eyes found a group of three kids. A young version of Ackerman twins and Eren. Young Reville is reading a book under a tree and Young Rivaille trying to calm Eren down._

_“Oi, Revy, can you keep an eye on Eren. I forgot my painting materials, I’ll be right back” Rivaille said, squeezing Eren’s hand and ran off. Rivaille didn’t gave time for Reville to reply back._

_Eren, on the other hand, spotted a blue butterfly that landed on flower. He slowly walks towards the flower with sparkling eyes, like it’s the most precious things on earth, but the butterfly flies away from him. That made him frown._

_His sad big eyes followed where the butterfly went, he took a side glance at Reville, who’s really busy reading the book. He took the chance and ran off to follow the blue butterfly. Reville didn’t noticed Eren ran off._

_I followed Eren and tried calling out for him, but he still keeps chasing the butterfly. Not until someone swiftly grabbed his small body and covered his mouth to keep him from screaming. I was shocked and didn’t know what to do._

_The one who grabbed him was a blond guy with glasses. Eren’s teal eyes were full of shock and fear. I ran back to where Reville was. What shocked me even more is by the time when I’ve arrived, Reville is already on the ground and his glasses cracks, while Rivaille is shouting and blaming him with full of rage._

_When Rivaille grabbed his twin by the collar, a young Jean jumped between them and held the fuming mad Rivaille back. While a young Connie helped Reville stand. Jean said something French that I can’t understand._

_I ran back to where Eren was grabbed by a blond guy. While I was running, I tripped over a root, by the time my face hit the ground, everything is black._


	16. Forgiveness?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm very sorry for the late update, forgive me, laziness took over me XD. So.. Here it is! Chapter 16 is up! Enjoy and Happy New Year everyone! <3

I just witnessed Eren’s kidnapping incident. Was that Eren’s doing? Is he messing my mind? Or am I getting insane? Then if he’s messing me, there’s a possibility that he’s dead and he’s haunting me. Like he used me for.. Something. But I don’t believe he’s dead, I believe he’s still alive.

I woke up by the smell of a very nauseating smell. It’s smells like medicine. When I opened my eyes, the first thing I saw is a familiar black blank ceiling. I’m in the hospital wing again, But the last time I remember I passed out was in Eren’s bedroom. How did they brought me here? How long did they find me there unconscious?

“Oh.. Finally you’re awake” Hange said that made me jerk, she’s mixing something on a cup. “How long am I out?” I asked while I propped myself. My body really felt weak right now, like I want to sleep for a thousand years. “hmm.. A day I guess…” she said and then she handed me the cup, “Drink this, it’ll make you better.” She added.

I took the cup, but when I smell it, it’s just like water. So, without a doubt, I drank it. But when the liquid flow pass through my throat, I choked and spew the water out because of the bitter taste. “What the hell is this?” I asked while coughing.

Hange shrugged, “Some healing potions I mixed, but don’t worry! It’s not poisonous. So… what are you doing in Eren’s room? Why did passed out there?” she asked. I was taken aback by the questions and I’m also having second thoughts of sharing about the some kind of flashbacks, I don’t even know if those are really real or just my mind made up.

“uhh.. My head hurts at that time…” I said, my head really hurts at that time, but I didn’t further explained what’s the cause of it. When she looked at me intently, I knew that very second that she knows that I wasn’t just having a headache. I just sighed, they’ll know about this anyway, “I know you won’t believe this, but.. I’m having flashbacks or something.. I saw how Eren was kidnapped..” I said.

I saw how her brown eyes sparkled when I mentioned it, “Really? Can you elaborate what you saw?” she said with a gentle voice, eyes still sparkling, it’s like she’s waiting for me to reveal something. So I started where I saw a young versions of the Ackerman twins, just exactly what Reville told me. Though I didn’t describe the guy who got Eren, there’s a possibility they’ll believe me and find the guy I’m describing. But that ‘blond guy’ is familiar to me, like I’ve seen him before.

When I finished telling her the whole, she started to pace in front of me with a big smile on her face. Then she ran out of the room, left me confused. Does she think I’m crazy now and she’ll use me in a experiment? I would never allow that.

Minutes later, Hange came back, the smile is still plastered on her face, “Evan, you’re fine now, right? Let’s go to the market” she said.

(×)

I avoided the confused stare of the people as we walked through the market. These people are very familiar to me, I work with them back then, they must be confused on why am I walking beside Hange Zoë, known scientist and professor of Titan Academy, and why am I wearing their uniform. They didn’t know that Daz made a huge mistake that night and he involved Armin in it. Instead of Armin, being caught, it is me who cover him.

I’m confused on why, that night, Ms. Kuchel picked me as a replacement for their Seeker. I know that she said she can feel power in me, but I don’t believe it’s just that. But I’ll be forever thankful to her that she did picked me and I won’t make her regret the decision she made back then by winning the game.

“Evan, you want to go somewhere? You seemed bored. You missed roaming around town?” Hange suddenly asked beside me. It took me for a while to answer her question, as I just got back to reality from overthinking again. “Yes.. I missed it.. What about you?” I asked back.

“oh, don’t worry about me. Why don’t you go to the town library, I’ll get you there when I’m done here.” She said. I nodded, but still confused, “What are you going to do here?” I asked, I also don’t know why are we in here. She winked, “Just going to buy some meat for my babies” she said.

Meat? Babies?

Before I can ask about it, she ran off while laughing, I don’t what’s funny, but I just shrugged and continued walking. I’m still avoiding the stares of the people. As I exited the market, everyone on the side walk made way for me. I know this. They all do this for the students to walk when they want to visit or buy something in town, but it feels really awful now that I am in their place. I just strode while my head is down.

I stood in front of the town library. What if the Arlerts are still here and Armin is inside, working? Then.. I need to go inside to find out. When I opened the door, the scent of books greeted me. I looked over at the counter, where Armin should be, isn’t there. What made me taken aback is that the person who’s sitting in the counter is Daz.

I slowly walked towards him, ready to kill him, but he seemed absorbed in the book he’s reading that he didn’t noticed my presence. This is the first time seeing him read a book. Daz is a low-key thug in town, he gets in to fights and he steal things to survive, I heard rumors that he lost his parents when he was just six years old.

I cleared my throat to get his attention. When he looked up to me, his eyes went wide, “E.. Evan?” he stuttered. “Do you work here? When were you released?” I asked, tapping my finger on the table, I’ll just cool myself for now. He seemed changed, he’s clothing style and I think he got a haircut. He straightened, “A-ah, yes.. J-just last week.. Evan.. Look, I’m sorry..” he said, slowly standing up.

“Do you think your ‘sorry’ can make them come back here?.. You know what? Forget it, and it doesn’t mean I already forgive you.” I said coldly. I really can’t help it. I can’t just forgive Daz, who’s been involving Armin in troubles for years.

“I.. I know.. Umm.. I have something to tell you.. It’s about Armin..” with that said, I immediately got in front of him and leaned closer to him. “What about him?” I asked. He looked up to me, but looks down again afterwards. “I saw Armin in Trost. I got there days ago to go visit and apologize to him, but I heard rumors that he’s a part of Rose Squad of Rose Academy that’ll participate a game and I already know what kind of game they’ll participate. I immediately got back here to tell you, but I think you’re also busy for the game.” He said.

That left me speechless, but he keeps going, “I know you’re also part of the squad, seeker, isn’t it? That Lunatic Professor told me,” when he mentioned it, I knew that he meant Hange, “and I know that you won’t believe me.. It’s just rumors anyway..” he finished. I stared at him for a moment, “Thanks.” I said, straightening my coat and go for the door, “I’ll see you later then” I said and left.

Before the door completely closed, I heard him shouted, “Good luck, Evan!”.

While I was walking down the street, I thought about Armin. Is he really in the Rose Squad? How? In what position? But to be sure, I must ask Hange, she knows.


	17. Heads Up

I tried asking Hange about the Rose squad and its official members, but she’s busy for the game as April is nearing, the month when the game starts. Right now, I’m in front of the full-length mirror, making sure that my forest green suit for tonight is good. The months I’ve spent here is fast and stressing. Despite that, I’ve discovered so much about my ability. I can now levitate without making me angry. I can also finally control over Mikasa’s manipulation, But I still can’t beat Rivaille though. They were days where our energy really drained from training. Plus, I’m also still thinking about the blond guy who kidnapped Eren. I didn’t open about the guy to everyone, aside the story. I just can’t. Maybe someday.. Not now.

In the month of December, we celebrate Christmas and the Ackerman twin’s birthday in the Manor with selected guests, Reville came back at that time. I welcomed the new year with them, I won’t forget that moment. But I’ll feel more better if the Arlerts were there. February came fast and today is the Grand Ball night. Where everyone, here in Sina, is invited. Tonight, we, Titan Squad, will be introduced to the people. We’re presenting this town of Sina, we’re going to play a game where our lives would be at risk. There’s a possibility that we can’t come back, but we got to try. I’m not even a student here, but Ms. Kuchel insisted, even bought me this suit I’m wearing right now.

“You looking good, Evan” Hange sang while she waltz in my quarters. I don’t know why, but Hange also wore a suit, never I’ve seen her wearing something girlish. “Are you sure you don’t want to cut your hair, it gotten longer.” She added while playing with the longer strands. I just noticed that my hair really got longer that it’s passed my shoulder. I was busy and too focused that I forgot to cut my hair.

“I really got busy from training.. Do I look bad with it?” I said while turning to face her. She took a step back and examined me from head to toe. “You look gorgeous, Evan, but let’s at least tidy it up.” She answered, then she pulled a small rubber band from her pocket. She gestured me to turn my back to her, I complied. As she was tying my hair, the blond guy came up in to my mind. This guy has been in my mind since that day, maybe if I’ll tell Hange about him, it will stop bothering my mind. But how will she react? What she’ll do right after I’ll tell her?

I cleared my throat, “Uhh.. Ms. Zoë, I have something to tell you.. It’s about the flash back or vision thing I got..” I said, carefully choosing my choice of words. She look straight to my eyes by the mirror and smiled, “Alright, spill it out” she said, continuing to tie my hair. I breathe in and out, “It’s a blond guy with glasses who kidnapped Eren.. I don’t know him, but he seem familiar to me.. I think he’s a teenager.”

“There you go!” Hange said, she made my hair in to a messy bun, she added, “Blond guy? Glasses? You don’t mean my fiancée right? Back then, Moblit used to use glasses,” she chuckled, but when she saw me that I shook my head, she went serious, “It’s normal for you to have that. All people who have telekinetic ability. I forgot to tell you about this, it’s like a fake memory, Evan. It’s your mind made up”. I sighed, frustrated, but what’s bothering my mind right now is Fiancée and Moblit. Fiancée? Are they in a relationship? I gave her an odd look, that made her confused, “What? You didn’t know, Evan? Moblit and I are in a relationship, even proposed to me a year ago, don’t worry! You’re invited to our wedding!” she said ecstatically while showing a glinting ring in her hand. I stare at it in awe. Now I know. They’re very closed to each other. I sometimes find Moblit and Hange in the hospital wing, talking fondly to each other, that sometimes I didn’t want to disturb them and walk off.

“You two are good for each other..” I said. Forgetting that we’re talking about the blond guy and the fake memory a while ago. Hange smiled, possibly brighter than the sun, then she looked in to her wrist watch, “We got to go now, the party starts at fifteen minutes!” she said. I took one look at the mirror, then she dragged me out of the room. While we’re walking through the hallway, I saw some students with their elegant dresses and suits. They still treat like I’m some outsider that isn’t supposed to be here, I really am, but I didn’t care about that right now.

The ballroom was very enchanted and aesthetic when we arrived. It’s really beautiful that my eyes widen in awe. Though, the room is already full with students and guests. I think, there are guests even from other villages near here. The students and guests are already sitting on their tables, chatting and complimenting about their looks tonight. Some are just fake, I can say that by their smiles. Some are just over about their make-up, to the point they look like a clown, I just laughed quietly. Hange let my hands go, “Wait here, Evan, I need to find the others.” She said and walks off. I know what she meant _others._

I just sighed and wandered my eyes around to also look for my squad, I should be with them. But someone tapped behind my shoulder. I turned around, and there, I saw a tall guy with a neat blond hair and his eyes were pale-blue, and not to mention, he also has gigantic caterpillar eyebrows. He gave me a smile and started speaking, “Wow. Look at you, Eren, you’ve grown. They didn’t bother to tell me that you’ve already found. You know that studying outside the country for just a year is very difficult,” I gave him a confused look. He mistaken me as Eren. “Don’t you remember me? Well, it’s been years since we’ve seen each other, but I’m Erwin, if you already forgot about my name.” he said with a chuckle. And in that moment, I realized that I’m talking to the former captain of Titan Squad, Erwin Smith.

“Oh.. I’m.. I’m not Eren..” When I said that, he went confused and was about to ask again, but Hange came. “Erwin!? Since when did you came back? It’s been a year since I’ve last seen you” she said directly to the Erwin guy, he looked at me with calculating eyes that made me look down. Hange added, “oh, and by the way, this is Evan Kruger, the squad seeker for this year’s game.” Erwin keeps staring at me, like Rico, that made me a bit uncomfortable. Then he asks, “Are you related to Eren Kruger?”

“No. I don’t even know him.” I answered without a doubt. I really don’t know Eren Kruger, but we do have the same last name, maybe we are related or he is my father… I don’t know. I’m not interested at that right now. Erwin was about to ask again, but Faye and Ms. Carla came to us. Faye wore a long elegant black dress and the woman wore an emerald silk dress, the two look really beautiful and stunning with their dresses. Hange immediately praised and complimented the two, I also did, ignoring Erwin’s calculating stare.

While they talked, I wandered my eyes to find Rivaille and the others. I haven’t seen them since this morning. I bet they’ve been busy for tonight too. I wonder what they’ll look like tonight? Are they even more stunning than everyone in here? While I’m busy with my thoughts, Hange suddenly grabbed my arm and dragged me out of the room, until we’re in the almost empty hallway. In the hallway , there, I saw Rivaille and the others. “Is everyone here?” Hange asked. Rivaille turned to her and nodded, then his eyes found mine. He wore a black fancy suit with a white cravat, he look so damn attractive tonight that I possibly couldn’t take my eyes from him. My feelings towards him is getting obvious and getting potent, but I did try my best to hide it inside me.

His lips twitched in to a small smile, this is rare and I can feel my cheeks are getting hot and red, I smiled back. “Your names will be called by the host, and don’t worry about finding a pair, you’ll be called one by one.” Hange said, then she grabbed Moblit’s arm. I looked over at Jean and Mikasa, she’s wearing a dark purple dress, while Jean is wearing a simple black suit. She fixed his bow tie while quietly talking to him, horse-face on the other hand, keeps smiling like an idiot. They’re good for each other, even though Jean is an idiot sometimes, I smiled at the thought.

Sasha tonight is wearing green flowy dress with butterflies sticking on the lower part. She fixed Connie’s ruined gray suit that made him annoyed of her actions, he keeps squirming from her grip, I chuckled. From inside the room, I heard someone spoke, but it’s muffled. “This is it, walk confidently” Hange said, and left us there. Rivaille walked towards the big closed door. He gestured me to stand behind him, I almost forgot that a seeker must be always near the captain, I complied. When I’m behind him, he spoke, “Your suit looks good on you” I extremely blushed at that and made me laugh nervously, “Yo-ou look good on yours too” I stuttered at the first word and it’s embarrassing, I just covered my face. When I heard him chuckled, it even made me embarrassed more, “Calm down, Evan.” He said.

Suddenly, the big doors opens itself that made me jump, “Everyone, our Titan Squad!” the host said enthusiastically on the mic, “First, our amazing captain and son of Kuchel Ackerman, Rivaille Ackerman!” the host added and Rivaille walked in. He walks so confidently with usual emotionless face. Everyone immediately applaud for him. Then he sat on one of the six black thrones that are aligned on the left side of the stage, he sat on the big one. Everyone’s attention are on me after Rivaille made himself comfortable, I feel like I want the ground to swallow me whole. “Next, is our Seeker that is full of determination, Evan Kruger!” everyone went silent when my name was announced. This is making me self-conscious, afraid to look at everyone in the eyes. But, out of nowhere, a person or people clapped loudly. I looked up, there, I saw Faye, Ms. Carla, Hange, Moblit, and Rivaille clapped for me. Followed by the four people behind me. I looked behind, Mikasa and the others smiled for me.

That’s enough motivation for me. I walked in confidently with my heads up, but what I didn’t expect while I’m walking is, everyone clapped. That made me smile and boosted my confidence. I continued walking until I reached the designated throne for me. Before I sat on it, I mouthed ‘thank you’ to the first people who clapped for me and then I sat. I let out the breath that I didn’t realized I’ve been holding and my heart beat is fast at the moment. I looked down at my fidgety fingers, I feel alive and nervous right now. “Heads up, Evan” Rivaille said beside me that made me jump. I looked over at him, he gave a side-smiled. I smiled back and looked forward in front of me. I can make it through the night!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (*_ _)人


	18. Unwelcome Guest

We all feel so high and powerful now that we’re complete in the thrones we’re sitting on. When a camera was set in front of us, I put on my prideful smile and for the second photo, I hope I successfully put on a fierce one and won’t look like an idiot once the photos are developed. This isn’t bad than I thought. But minutes later, I felt something isn’t right…

While the host is having a short speech, everyone is listening to them, I can feel the distress and worry in Rivaille beside me. Something isn’t really right. I can feel his eyes were wandering around the room, like he’s searching for something or someone. I was about to ask him if he’s alright, but the big doors suddenly opens. Everyone in the room, including us, jumped. Hange and the school staffs stands and got alarmed by that. By the door, I saw a black-haired man with a blond guy with glasses came in.. Wait..

“Good Evening, everyone. Sorry for being late and ending up interrupting the speech. I am still invited, right, Kuchel?” the black-haired man said and looked back behind him. Behind him, there, Ms. Kuchel and Reville. They both look uncomfortable, especially Reville. He looks more paler, like he’d seen a ghost. So that’s why I didn’t saw the woman earlier, she’s with him. I didn’t thought Reville would come. But the blond man… he looked so familiar, like I’ve seen him before.

“Ah.. Yes, you are, Eren… Hange? Can you get the two a table?” Ms. Kuchel said, she tried to be calm and collected. When she said that, Hange looked like about to argue, but the woman just nodded. Rivaille beside me growled lowly, “What’s that fucker doing here?”. Who are they? I didn’t know who he meant. Does he meant Reville’s appearance? When I turned to Connie beside me, he looked alarmed too, “Connie, who are they?” I asked. He turned to me, “The man who has black hair is _Eren Kruger_ and the blond one is _Zeke Jaeger._ Eren Kruger is close to Ms. Kuchel, while Zeke is.. I don’t know.. We’re just angry at him.. That’s Eren’s stepbrother” He said quietly. I got tensed when I heard the name Kruger. But I looked over at the blond guy again, I really can’t pinpoint where I’ve seen him.

When the two men looked over at us, their eyes widen when their eyes were on me, especially the Kruger guy, like he’d seen something taking him aback. In their backs, I can see Ms. Kuchel and Reville’s piercing glares towards the two, I’ve never seen the two like that before. The two men slowly walked towards us, that made Rivaille stand, “Eren? Is that you? Carla never told me..” Zeke said. I don’t know why, but I automatically glared. My instinct says that he’s a threat. “I am not Eren.” I said through gritted teeth. I don’t know why I am suddenly angry.

Hange walked towards the host and whispered something to them. The host nodded and said, “It seems they will be having an emergency meeting, but are you all okay with that?” some nodded warily and some are just still. When Rivaille walks off the stage, that’s our cue to stand and follow him. The men were escorted outside the room and maybe brought them to the meeting room. Are we really going to have an emergency meeting with those men? About what? Am I the only one who doesn’t know what’s going on?

When we’re by the door, Reville walked quickly beside me, “Don’t worry, Evan. You’re not alone. I also don’t know what the hell they're doing here.” He whispered to me. I looked at him confusedly, his eyes were in front, beads of sweats falling in his face. He doesn’t know. What hell is going on? Do I have to be afraid? While we’re walking in the hallway, our distress are mixed and getting stronger. “Calm down, everyone. There’s nothing wrong with the men. Just don’t let your guards down.” When Ms. Kuchel said that, nervousness and confusion crept in me. Are they dangerous? I have so many questions in mind.

(×)

“Wow. You all have grown so much. The last time I saw you all is when you were just little brats. And..” his gaze turned towards me, “At first, I thought you were Eren, but Who are you?” he asked. I automatically glared at Kruger, “I’m.. Evan Kruger.. Are we related by any chance?” I asked through gritted teeth. I think or my mind is playing tricks, but I just a glint of panic in his eyes. Suspicious..

“Cut the bullshit, Mr. Kruger, what brings you here?” Rivaille suddenly asked that made Ms. Kuchel hissed. Kruger cleared his throat, “Nothing, we don’t have plans, so we barged in here. I mean.. We’re welcome, right? We also want to say ‘Good Luck’ to you all,” he said, ignoring my question, “We traveled from Liberio to here. Can’t we get a warm welcome..” he said.

Ms. Kuchel just ignored him and calmly, but her eyes were starting to glow, asked directly to Zeke, “How are your representatives, Zeke? Are they doing well? Did you train them well? ” the man shifted uncomfortably in his seat and tapped dry his sweats falling down with a napkin, it isn’t hot in here, is it possible that he is afraid of her? Or worst, the Ackermans? What if Mr. Kenny is here? And.. Representatives? I listened closely to them.

Zeke cleared his throat, “Ah, yes, Marley Squad is doing well..” He said with a deep shaky voice. So, he’s one of the trainers of Marley Squad. I suddenly asked, “What are you doing here? You should be with them, you should be at Liberio,” when I realized that, I immediately covered my mouth and everyone’s eyes were on me. Rivaille beside me just grunted. What the hell did I just do?

“As I said, we don’t have plans. When we heard about the ball, we immediately traveled here, in Sina, and we thought Grisha would be here.” Kruger said. Then he added, “I guess you all want us to leave by your piercing glares.” He laughed, but humorless. He and Zeke began to stand and walked towards the doors like nothing. “Once again, Good Luck to you all, dear players. Hope you all can survive until the end.” He said with dangerous glint in his blue eyes before they both disappear.

But outside, I can hear someone talking loudly, and then, followed by a loud thump, like someone has fallen on the ground. We immediately stand and walked outside the meeting room to see what’s that sound. In the hallway, we saw Eren Kruger on the floor, backing away from the now furious Carla Jaeger. Her amber eyes glowed and full of anger. Behind her is Faye, who’s holding her back. “Just get lost, bastard.” She said with a voice nothing like her. This a very shocking sight, a woman who is stronger than a man.

Kruger grunted in pain, “I’ll come back for you, my love. I’ll prove to you that I am much better than Grisha.” He said, I was left speechless at that. “All so sudden, Eren? What the hell are you even saying? he’s way better than you, so Get lost!” the woman shouted that made us cover our ears and my body shook. Zeke then helped him stand and straightened his crumpled suit. Then they start walking away without saying another word. That provided more questions in my mind.

Ms. Kuchel immediately go to the woman and embraced her tightly. Faye, on the other hand, leaned in the nearest wall and sighed. Ms. Kuchel muttered something to her and she answered, “I’m fine, Kuchel, I’m just carried away,” and she looked at us, “Did your ears hurt from my shout? I’m so very sorry, I can’t hold it. I’m sorry you have to see that.” She sincerely said with worry in her eyes. Everything is calm now, but my body is still shaking a bit.

“Let’s all go to the hospital wing so that I can check you all” Hange said.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I forgot to thank you all for the kodus you left, I appreciated it very much! (◕‿◕)♡


	19. Answers to my Questions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 19 is up!

"Ms. Zoë, can I talk to you?” I peaked my head on the half opened door of the room she is in. She is in the hospital wing, as usual, doing some paperwork, her next class is still this afternoon. I know I shouldn’t bother her, but the questions in my mind won’t silence. I even barely slept last night because of that. So asking and letting it out to her might help, but I don’t think she’ll answer it. They were too personal.

She raised her gaze to me, “Oh? Evan? Yeah, sure. Come, sit here.” She said, gesturing the seat in front of the desk. Today, we don’t have training because of what happened yesterday. Connie’s ears were bleeding so much that he almost fainted while we’re walking. That’s why the two women, Ms. Kuchel and Ms. Carla, are worried and made us rest today. Thinking our ears might bleed too.

I walked towards the seat and sat on it, preparing myself to asked some questions. “Who is Kruger to Ms. Kuchel and Ms. Carla?” I asked and abruptly looked down. Afraid to look at Hange’s confused and offended face. I don’t know why I think she will be offended. I mean, the question is too personal, that might made her think I’m a nosy person. I’m just curious and the questions I’m keeping inside my head is making me insane.

I heard her cleared her throat, but I still didn’t brought my gaze up, instead, I looked down at my fidgety hands. “The three were closed friends, let’s even include Grisha, Carla’s husband and Eren Jaeger’s father. Kruger liked Carla so much, let’s say.. He’s obsessed to her. He didn’t gave up until now that Carla already has Grisha. Grisha, on the other hand, didn’t know that Kruger’s in love with his wife for years, Carla never said a word about it, she should’ve before it will got worst, but I don’t have the say to this. Kruger is a dangerous man.” When she said that last line, that made me shiver.

“What about.. Zeke?” I asked, I know Connie already told me about Zeke Jaeger yesterday, but I just need confirmation. Not to mention that he looks familiar to me.

She continued, “Zeke.. Oh, that guy.. I do hate him, we all are.. He’s Eren’s stepbrother, son of Grisha’s first wife. He’s a professor and a trainer at Marley Academy. He’s prideful and a conceit man. When Eren was born in this world, he already hated him. He acted like an angel with everyone around, but when him and Eren are alone, there are possibilities that Zeke will kill him, Rivaille told me this. Even suspected Zeke as the one who kidnapped Eren, but he has no evidence, says he can feel it.”

Finally, having the confidence to raise my gaze and looked up to her. Hange’s eyes were full of, let’s say, anger. I thought she won’t continue. “When I saw the two, Kruger and Zeke, together for the first time, I thought it was just coincidence, but as the years passed by, I often see them together. That’s the time I and Kuchel suspected, but we didn’t utter a word about it. We’ll just watch what will happen next.” She said. Then she asked me, “What do you think of him, Evan?”

“Hmm.. When I first saw him back yesterday, he was full of confidence and power, but when we’re already at the meeting room, he was all sweaty all of a sudden. Especially when Ms. Kuchel asked him. Is Zeke afraid of her? Or not just her.. Or maybe I’m just seeing things..” I said. I really saw that he’s sweating and his hands were shaky when he wiped his face with a handkerchief.

Hange laughed, maniacally, that made me jump “Yes, he is, Evan! He’s scared when the Ackermans are around. He must be lucky yesterday that Kenny wasn’t around yesterday. If he is, Zeke might pee in his pants.” She said and even laughed more loudly. I was horrified and have an urge to laugh at the same time. I think I understand Zeke a bit. When I first saw the Ackermans, they were creepy and scary that I thought they were a family of sadists and serial killers, but as times passed by while I’m with them, I was wrong. Their appearance might be fearsome, but their hearts are full of kindness and love, especially Ms. Kuchel. I don’t know Mr. Kenny. But I guess he is too.

“Ackermans are the most powerful, richest, and fearsome family here in Sina. Even more powerful than the other families in the other town and villages. Though, only a few of them were left. There’s a possibility that the Ackerman family might end up in the twins and Mikasa’s generation. The three won’t accept an arranged marriage. As we all know that Mikasa and Jean are together, Rivaille still hoping that Eren might come back, and Reville being Reville, he has knowledge and everything. He’s the most smartest kid I’ve known in my whole life, smarter than me! But, like I said, that’s where the line might end. Rivaille and Reville are the only hopes, but Rivaille is stuck and Reville just won’t accept it, he even cried like a child when Kuchel announced the idea of arranging a marriage.”

I didn’t want her to stop, so I eagerly listened to her, I can stay here whole day listening to her. She continues, “The twins liked and loved Eren, but Reville loves his self more and gave his twin a chance with Eren. They were five years olds when Eren and Rivaille announced that they were boyfriends and will stay by each other forever, it was the cutest moment in my whole life. They were just young children, but their love for each other are stronger than any other relationships. The Ackermans are even happy that their family might continue on. But when Eren was gone, we were lost, confused, and hurt at that time.” I didn’t realized my tears were already running down. “It hit us so hard.”

Hange also shed tears. She took off her glasses and wiped her tears. I also wiped mine. They were still questions in my mind, but I think this is enough.

Hange straightened and put up a confident and determined smile, “But we’ll bring him back, maybe someday, but not now.” She said.


	20. Sawney and Bean

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is just a very short chapter where I'm going introduce Sawney and Bean. I'll try to post chapter 21 this week. I've been busy with school stuff these days, forgive me. Chapter 20 is up, Enjoy!

April has arrived and we only have few days left before the game begins. After Eren Kruger arrived, they’re starting to get protective. They’re scared that Kruger might hurt me, they didn’t tell me the reason why. I think it’s because the fact Eren Kruger is a dangerous man, we don’t know what he’s capable of.

Right now, Hange skipped happily ahead of us. She said that she wants us to meet her ‘babies’. Everyone, including me, don’t know what she meant. As far as I could remember, I heard her mentioned when we were in the market to buy some meats for her babies. Who in the right mind think that a baby can eat a meat? Or is it even a baby?

Hange opened a door that leads to long dark stairway. Connie and Sasha, that are very curious, are the first ones to climbed down, even pushed each other by the door. Our footsteps and Connie’s laugh echoed as we climbed down.

When we arrived at the bottom, Hange quickly walked towards a huge old wood double doors. “Let me check first if they’re already awake.” She said, with that, she slipped in through the door and disappeared behind it.

While we’re waiting patiently, we heard a low growl inside the room where Hange walked in. It’s unlike a persons growl, even louder, it’s more like an animal growling. Suddenly, Hange opened the door and gestured us to come. Connie and Sasha came in first, Jean and Mikasa followed. I thought I was the only one left, not until someone cleared throats behind me, “Lady’s first, Evan.” Rivaille. I turned to him, “I’m not a lady!” I said with a glare and start marching towards the door, before I completely came in, I heard Rivaille say Cute followed by a chuckle. Do I look cute to him?

“Oi, Evan, your face is red, are you okay?” Jean asked with a hint of tease. I just ignored him and moved past him, I heard them all, they laughed at my flustered face. My feet stopped in front of a huge steel cage. In it, is a small black dragon with piercing purple eyes. It’s gaze sent shivers through my spine. It walked slowly towards me and growled lowly.

When I felt like my legs are getting weak, “That’s Bean, by the way. It’s only two years old.” Hange said. She pointed to the other cage, “and that’s Sawney, it’s just the same as Bean. They both arrived here two years ago, when I started teaching here. I got so excited and horrified at the same time!” she squealed with her hands up high. I can see that.

“I immediately named them Sawney and Bean.” She said and looking at the dragons fondly, I was amazed when the two creatures replied with a whimper. “Don’t be afraid, alright? I’m just going to let them out from their cages.” Hange said and proceeded to unlock their cages. Without a thought, I started backing away with shaky legs. When I was far enough, the two creatures slowly got out from their cages and approached us. The difference between the two is that Sawney is a bit bigger than Bean.

Seems like Sawney is wary of me, because its piercing eyes only bore on me while approaching me with deliberate steps, that made froze on my spot. When Sawney was about a few feet away from me, it suddenly bowed its head to me. “Pet it, Evan! I think Sawney likes you!” Hange cheered with a clap. I looked towards her, “What if it bites my hand? I can’t afford losing my hand before the game..” I said, slowly lowering my right hand to its head anyway, I’m curious. And it’s the first time I’ve seen a dragon in my whole life, I only can imagine them when I’m reading some fantasy genre books with Armin. And speaking of Armin, I didn’t further asked about the Rose Squad members, I want to find it myself. In a few days, we’ll be seeing all again with the other squads anyway.

When my hand landed on the head, I flinched because of the roughness, but slowly caressed it after seconds. While I was doing that, it purred loudly, that made me amazed. I think Sawney can trust me now. So, I slowly crouched and proceeded caressing the other parts. I guess we have something to lessen our nervousness and anxiety. By spending a day with Sawney and Bean.


	21. See you later, Sina.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Have you all seen the latest snk manga chapter? Not intending to spoil, I'm sorry in advance, but I really couldn't believe that Zeke just died like that, I expected that Levi will be having difficulties on killing him, but he just fly towards him and cut his head. And Levi finally fulfilled his promise to his friend, Erwin, I really cried at that part (T_T). I just want to share my reaction after reading the latest chapter, I can't keep it in myself XD. and before I'll ended up spoiling everything, Chapter 21 is up! Enjoy! ;)

It was Hange who woke me up early in the morning, the sun hasn’t risen up yet, I could tell that it’s only three in the morning. She suddenly barged in my quarters with “Good morning, Evan, Rise and Shine!” that made bolted up, alarmed. But when I saw that it’s only her, I just sighed in relief and planted my feet on the floor and messed my messy long hair even more, didn’t know what to do. Hange seems to have read my mind when she started rummaging through the closet, while I’m still sitting on the bed, staring at her fast movements blankly. I really hate being awoken in early mornings. But this is the day when we depart and started traveling to Titanium City. Titanium City is a far place, it will took us a day to arrived there. The place is advanced in technology, people in there are geniuses and are rich. Hange showed me what Titanium City looked like, since the others already knew, the place looks so good. She also showed me a dome and at the back of it is tall tower, where the game will be put to place.

I was really confused. As far as I could remember, we will be having the game in an island. I was even more confused when Hange laughed at my bewildered expression. She just said, “Oh, I forgot to tell you about the island thing, but maybe later. You know, I still have tons of works waiting on my desk.”. That’s when I realized I’m bothering her so much. I also tried asking the others, but seems like they’re everywhere in the academy when we have free time, and I just don’t want to waste my time searching for them, especially when the academy is too big. When we’re training, I can easily forget about it and just focused on training.

When Hange was done, I opened the suitcases, they were full of my clothes, even my undergarments. She just gave me a sheepish grin and pushed me to the bathroom, “Come on, Evan, you don’t want to be left do you? And your hair is way too longer now, do you want me to cut it?” she asked. Thankfully, she didn’t summon any servants, like the first day. She didn’t gave me time to answer or think and started turning on the faucet, filling the tub. But when I tested the waters by stubbing my toes on the tub, I quickly pulled it out, it’s so cold! I don’t know, but I whined and stomped my feet, “It’s cold, Ms. Zoë.”

“Alright, alright. Why don’t you just wash your face.” Hange said and chuckled afterwards. She proceeded on turning off the faucet and drained the water in the tub, while I made my way towards the sink and started splashing cool water on my face. Then proceeded brushing my teeth, lazily. When I’m finally awake, thanks to the cool water, I looked at myself in the mirror. My hair really got long, that I can see some strands laying on my chest. I turned to Hange, who’s preparing my outfit, she’s acting a mother to me again, “If you don’t mind, I want to cut them. I mean, I can do it on my own, but I don’t trust myself right now that I just woke up.” I said, laughed a bit.

Hange replied with a squeal. Oh no.

“Wait! Are you sure that I can trust you?” I defended. I know that squeal, it mean she’s excited. And by the word excited, it can possibly mean it’s her first time. She looked at me, surprised, “Yes, Evan. I Promise, I won’t let you down.” She said and held up a promise gesture. I stare at her, warily, but gives up anyway. I turned back on the mirror and braced myself on what will come. I still have a bit of anxiety in me, what if she fails? And I’ll look ridiculous of my new haircut? I want to look good in front of Rivaille. I sighed and let Hange do as she wish.

The only people here in the academy are myself, Hange, Moblit, Mike, some school staffs, and guards. The students went home, some graduated, because the class ended last month. The others also went home to spend their last moment (hope it’s not) with their families. Since I don’t have a family to come home to, I just spent it with Hange and Moblit, thankfully they’re not busy. And the best part was, Ms. Carla sent me a box of Cinnamon buns with a ‘Good Luck’ card tucked under the ribbon of the box. Since I can’t really it all, I ate it with the couple. I should thank her later for that.

Back to reality, Hange was silent, examining my hair carefully. Then she snapped the scissors and started cutting. I let my eyes closed and listened to the scissor’s snapping. I can feel the strands of hair, that were cut, pooling on my feet. Minutes later, “Done! Open your eyes, Evan.” Hange sang. When I opened my eyes, I was struck. The style of haircut Hange did is like Eren’s. Don’t know what to do but looked at Hange through the mirror. She had her hand covering her mouth and murmured, “Bloody hell. You already looked like Eren..” with sparkling brown eyes. I ran my hand through my soft brown hair, still messy, and stare at myself in the mirror. It wasn’t that good, it’s not bad either, just right.

From my peripheral view, Hange winked, “Thank me later. First, you must changed in to your uniform. Just call me if you’re having difficulties.” She said and walked out of the bathroom. What will the others think of my new haircut? What will Rivaille think? Will he be upset? I mean, I looked like his lover, Eren, now. I just shook my head, erasing the thoughts and start moving. We might be late because of me. First, I cleaned the strands of hair that is pooling on my feet and threw it away in a nearby bin. Then, I started jumping on the black pants with the black leather belt.

I proceeded with the white shirt and tucked it in under the pants, I don’t like it swaying and left my stomach open. I picked up the bolo tie, I’m surprised that it’s not the linen one and thankfully I know how to do this. In the middle, is a purple oblong gem. Then I put on the inky black coat, that its length on my knees. I walked towards the full-length mirror and took a look over myself. I looked like some police officer because of the Academy’s silver dragon insignia on my left chest and the silver Seeker insignia on the right. It’s simple, yet I looked powerful. Excitement and nervousness bubbled up inside of me. I hope we will make it out alive.

Snapping out of my thoughts, I put on the knee-length black boots, took one more look of myself, straightening the coat, and walked out.

(×)

I shivered and my legs were shaking because of the cold breeze of the morning when we finally went outside, I was supposed to be one who’ll bring my suitcases, but my hand betrayed me and just let the guards brought it outside. The sun isn’t up yet, the stars are still visible. We waited for minutes, until the steel gate opened, a carriage made its way in front of us. I was confused, “Only one? Where are the others?” I asked with a shaky voice. It’s not winter, it’s not even near December yet. Hange looked at me, “Oh.. I guess the others are already in the station.” She said and just shrugged, that even made me confused. Station?

I was about to ask again, but the carriage is so inviting and warm, so I strode towards it and came in. I sighed in relief when I can feel the warm again, it’s comfortably warm. The couple also came in and sit beside each other. “You still cold, Evan? Here, wear this gloves.” Hange spoke and tossed me a pair of leather gloves. I muttered a ‘thank you’ and wore it. When the carriage started moving, I closed my eyes, not intending to take a nap, I’m still very sleepy, but I’m fighting against it

The three of us are just silent, but a comfortable one, that made me want to go back to bed and forget about the game. The game that will take our lives at risk. I think I’m the only one who is weak and a coward in this year’s game. The other participants must have think about participating, wisely, and go with risking their lives. There are still someone better than me out there. But the thought of Ms. Kuchel offering the position to me without a doubt is making me motivated and determined to fight until we win. I won’t disappoint them, even the squad, this is one of the reasons why I want to fight. The other is that I want to come back to Armin, Grandpa, and Historia, they’re the only family I have.

If Armin really is participating the game, I don’t know what will I do. It’s too late if I want him to back-out, there’s no turning back or a U-turn. But I hope he really isn’t participating and Daz was just seeing things or something. I can’t imagine Armin in a battlefield when he is the softest person I’ve met in my whole life. I know, deep inside of him, that he is strong and I forgot to mention that he also has a strong mind, he’s wise. And if he’s wise, he wouldn’t participate the game and get himself killed. But still… what if?

The carriage came in to a stop, that made me open my eyes. I looked outside, we were in a place that is surrounded by trees, like we’re in a forest. Hange and Moblit came out, I’m clueless again, but followed the two anyways. In front of us is a bricked-building and above it is a huge sign ‘Sina Train Station’, I guess this the station Hange mentioned earlier. The building is lit up, but there are no people around, I never knew that Sina had a train station. The couple started walking towards the entrance, but stopped when they feel that I’m not following them, “Is there something the matter, Evan?” Hange asked. I looked back to the carriage, “What about my things?” I asked back. Hange snickered, “Don’t worry, they’ll take care of it.” And pulled me with her. “Shit. When will I stop forgetting things. This is the Sina train station, they started building last year and just finished last month, but they didn’t tell the townspeople yet. This station will be opened for all next week.” She said.

Moblit pushed the double doors, I squinted because of the bright light inside. When I fully opened my eyes, the inside of the building is big and spacious, benches right here and there, and some empty ticket booths. I saw Connie and Sasha, asleep on a bench. With her head on his shoulder and his head fallen backwards, that made him face the ceiling. They wore the same outfit as mine, but they don’t have a badge or insignia on their right chest, like mine, they just have the Academy’s insignia. The only people has this, including me, is Rivaille and Mikasa. Speaking of the two, I looked around to look for them, but seems like they didn’t arrived yet.

Hange woke the two by tapping both their shoulders. Connie, alarmed, bolted up and made a fighting stance. Hange backed away, “Chill, Connie! It’s me!” she said with a laugh. Connie realized and apologized, “I’m sorry, Professor. I thought you were someone else.” Then he stretched with a yawn. I looked over at Sasha, who blinked owlishly at me, “Can someone pinch me? I think this is Eren right in front me.” She said. I blushed and playfully pinched her elbow, “It’s Evan, Sasha. Ms. Zoë was the one who cut my hair like this..” I said and looked over at Hange who’s talking to a school staff that I don’t even know was there.

Connie suddenly ran to me and grabbed both of my shoulder to shake the life out of me, “Evan!? Is this you!?” he asked, wide-eyed. The shaking makes me dizzy, so I grabbed both of his arms to stop, “Yes, Connie, this is Evan.” I said and sighed when the shaking finally stopped. He continued staring at me, Sasha spoke, “I’m excited what will be the Ackermans’ reaction! Oh, I’ll pinched myself every minute to prove that I’m not hallucinating or something.” And laughed. I just rolled my eyes, playfully.

We all went silent when we heard the double door opened, followed by several footsteps, so I turned around. There, Rivaille leading the way, like an Alpha in a pack, with Mikasa and Jean by his side, the three walked confidently towards us. Rivaille’s Golden Captain insignia glinted as it hits the light. I think I looked like a tomato right now, when the moment Rivaille’s eyes found mine, knees getting weak by only his gunmetal eyes on me. He only made it worse when he smiled.

Our eyes never left each other.

When he was close, I could see the longing and sadness in his eyes, that made my heart clenched. I was about to speak, but Hange said with a hint of tease, “I’m sorry to interrupt, but we need to move now~” and then she grabbed my arm and took me with her. I hid my face with my free hand out of embarrassment. “Chill, Evan. I’m really sorry for interrupting your moment, you made something in Rivaille alive and I saw the familiar glint in his eyes when he looked at you.” Hange teased. It made my heart thumped fast and I just whined and held her arm tight. When we’re by the platform, the train is already waiting, sliding doors opened. Everyone walked inside, leaving me outside. But before I walked in, I looked back where we came from and mumbled to myself, **“See you later, Sina.”**


End file.
